It’s Crisis Time, Ya’ll

by |
09/26/2008 12:00 PM |

"If money isn’t loosened up, this sucker could go down,” Bush said yesterday as he watched both his legacy and bailout plan built on the screwing of others fall apart.

So while everything on Wall Street implodes, I’ve decided now is an excellent time to start listening to Ryan Adams. Turn on “Cry On Demand” (so underrated!) and bear these things in mind as we roll into a weekend of sideways rain and possibly-canceled Presidential debate parties:

Everything is suddenly much funnier. Because it’s all so terrible! Isn’t it exciting to be alive? Gorge yourself on pictures of unbelievably adorable pugs, then read the news while you’re still giggly.

The Greatest Depression coverage on all your favorite blogs is trumping posts about
whether Lindsay Lohan and Sam Ronson are getting married tomorrow and
have adopted a family of abandoned street ruffians. Do you
feel smarter already? No more celebutards! Ask and ye shall receive.

There are new book deal proposals to be had about how this Crash of 2008 has affected you and yours! Do as Andrew Ross Sorkin does, and act now on this hot literary trend before all the good publishing houses are taken.