by |
10/22/2008 1:30 PM |

There is a hilarious story in amNewYork today about stupid people who pose as reporters to “hobnob” with “influencial New Yorkers” at exclusive fancy parties, galas, and super fantastic fundraising events. J-schoolers are so glamorous, no? It’s not as if we sit at computers all day and all night, tired and hunched over and grouchy with our cups of coffee and our Thesauruses, wondering whether Media will be absorbed into the hellmouth of the Depression and take us All Down With It as we compulsively check RSS feeds. No: while the rest of the world worries about the economy and election, we’re partying and saving the children. That’s why everyone wants to be us, obvs:

About 24 fake journalists tried to get into a recent gala to raise
money for poor children this year, compared to the usual five or so,
said Claudia Stepke, head of Claudia Stepke Associates, a
public-relations firm. She figures the boom of posers partially could
be due to the economy.

This journalistic lifestyle is so freaking amazing that in addition to making up media outlets, some people say they are working for ACTUAL REAL ONES, like, what do you know, amNewYork! A man who goes by the name Robert Miller has been posing as a reporter for the daily for years, using his faux credentials to scam his way into swanky events. Witness his balls:

The fakers also pretend to work for any of the city’s real newspapers
or national magazines. One person, who goes by the name of Robert
Miller, has persistently made the rounds with at least five public
relations firms recently, saying he works for amNewYork. Miller,
described only as a man in his mid-50s, has been trying to trick event
organizers for years. The fake reporter has created a phony amNewYork
email address and has a partner he calls Alex Page. Miller also claims
to work for other publications to sneak into other events.

If you see Robert Miller at any of the fabulous MSM parties you attend with boldface byliners, point to him and yell: “Call the feds! Take this man, his digital voice recorder, his red pen, and his press card away immediately! He has not indebted himself with a Columbia degree, nor did he use his blog to become a Harper‘s contributor! He is an imposter and does not deserve to munch on hors d’oeuvres and kiss famous-person ass for interesting quotes!” Say all of that, but very quickly, before he scurries away into the night.

Or, just do the really funny, passive-agressive thing — this is why this news-business is so forking phenomenal! feel the power! — and get a Medical Expert to state, in fancy, on-the-record terms, that he is just a sad, lame oldster with an insecurity complex:

Beyond free food and wine, people who pose as journalists could be
seeking a boost to their self worth, said Kristin Sommer, a Baruch
College associate professor in psychology.

"[That] behavior might be dominant in people who don’t have a
particularly strong self worth," she said. "Their own worth is defined
in terms of the kind of connections that they have."