Hillary Clinton: Honor First, Gossip Later

by |
12/02/2008 5:00 PM |

Gov. David Paterson has certain priorities set when it comes to fueling the rumor mill about who will take over Hillary Clinton’s Senate seat. They are simple. Honor her! Say nice things! Don’t focus on that empty chair! So, basically, just push off the gossip-mongers for… like, a day! That’s all. Just 24-hours. A mere rotation of our lovely planet. Can you keep it together until then?

“We can go through all the gossip and all this stuff tomorrow,”
Paterson said at one point. “I’m not getting into who the candidates

No. Nobody can. There is no longer any self-control left in this country, because we’re using it all to stop ourselves from buying each other presents so the holidays can stay canceled. Therefore, speculation runs rampant. And we like it that way. Hear that, Paterson? It’s all we have. Literally.