Jordin Sparks will be performing her new single, “Battlefield,” on tomorrow night’s American Idol results show. And in it, she will ask, repeatedly, “Why does love always feel like a battlefield?” The answer, of course, is that love always feels like a battlefield, because love is a fucking battlefield. I know that it is because Pat Benetar told me so in 1985 when she released a very popular song called “Love is a Battlefield,” which contains the line, “Love is a battlefield.”
But yeah, indie rock fans are the ones who are too insular, you know. Not the pop stars who stand on stage belting out cliché after cliché while surrounded by people who make too much money to tell them they might want to consider finding a new metaphor.