God Help Us All: Aerosmith Looking for a New Singer

11/10/2009 11:20 AM |

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First, the good news. Aerosmith is totally not breaking up.

But now, the very bad, very hilarious and actually, oh god, completely depressing news: Aerosmith is looking for a new singer. After news broke yesterday that Steven Tyler was planning to focus on his solo career, or on “Brand Tyler” as he likes to call it, Joe Perry assured fans that Brand Aerosmith was not going anywhere, unless you actually have any understanding of what the Aerosmith brand consists of. Rolling Stone reports:

Joe Perry took to his Twitter page yesterday to relay some potentially positive news to fans: despite Steven Tyler’s apparent departure, “Aerosmith is definitely NOT breaking up.” Perry also confirmed that the remaining four members of Aerosmith would seek out a new singer while Tyler did “his own thing.”

“Aerosmith is positively looking for a new singer to work with. You just can’t take 40 years of experience and throw it in the bin!” Perry tweeted yesterday, November 9th. “Band is playing hotter than ever and our songs need to be played live! Don’t despair; Aerosmith not splitting up. Promise that’s the last you’ll hear from me on the subject till we gear up again.”

Might I suggest they contact Shakira? Or this guy. Or her. Or the dude from Frostbyteband. Or Mao Raddney Badeo. Or, you know what? This could actually work really well.