- Ladies and gentlemen, the next Lieutenant Governor of Illinois.
Really nice work by comical combovered villain Richard Shelby, detracting attention from a story embarrassing to Dems: Scott Lee Cohen, who beat a crowded field to win the nomination for Lieutenant Governor of Illinois, has a past checkered with a vicious 2005 assault on his convicted-prostitute then-girlfriend (charged were dropped when she didn’t show up in court), and allegations of sexual assault and steroid abuse leveled by his ex-wife in their divorce proceedings. (Another win for the primary system and party faithful!)
Amid calls for his withdrawal from the race, this champ of a person went on TV with his ex-wife. It was the ‘roids made him do it, they agreed: “You know what. It was all at the same time, it was a bad time in my life. You know, I was trying to put muscle on. It was a bad decision.”
Larry “Wide Stance” Craig and dozens of rehab-bound apologists can breathe a little easier today: “I was trying to put muscle on” must surely be the new greatest excuse in the history of politics.