Comment of the Week! Funnier Than the Original Post! Dammit.

04/09/2010 12:33 PM |

internet commenters
  • Diamond was never quite the same.

He’s done it before, and I’m sure he’ll do it again, but beloved contributor and not infrequent blog commenter Paul D’Agostino has bested a post of mine with a far funnier comment. Damn his hide. Here it is, then, after the jump, in response to my post about the New York Times writing a story about people who obsessively photograph their food before eating it.

You are a very healthy breakfaster, so you must also do very well on standardized tests and never fail to catch that high pop-fly as it nearly clears the wall in deep right. “Morgens wie ein Koenig,” say the Germans.

Anyway, is that a pepper grinder or a misplaced robot in the midst? A small gorilla?

And anyway, yes, that was among the most useless (and competition was high) of the Times’ “Internet and You” series, as you’ve called it. Though I regret to have read the whole thing, especially the part about the unthinkable unbearableness of a Garcian nightmare, I assure you that the only reason I read it is because I take screenshots of every article I read, then post them online so that everyone else can see replicated versions of them. This is certainly a culturally important act, one that will interest people “as far away as Ecuador.”*

Then, one day, if it all works out just right, the Times will write an article about me taking screenshots of articles I’ve read, and I’ll read that article, which would feature a picture of me taking a screenshot of an article, and I’ll take a screenshot of that article picturing me taking a screenshot, and that will have to be the end of all my living pursuits so that Baudrillard and I can share a tearful, dead laugh.

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* Really, read the article. It’s fully of stupid shit like that. Wait, did Malcolm Gladwell write it? Because there’s no argument to be found. Just sayin’.