Teen Severely Wounded In Statue of Liberty Shot Mishap

by |
05/04/2010 2:01 PM |

Here is a news item bearing the headline:

Woman, 19, Burned by Flaming Vodka at Upstate Party

The potential disfigurement of a young woman who had the misfortune of being in the vicinity of some douchecock who recently discovered pyromania as a fun party trick is not funny, and we are not laughing.

Tragedies such as these need not befall future generations of Fredonia teens—remember, kids, to keep the flammable material in a contained space, and to be aware of the flame tailing back up to the larger container. In general, it’s safer to light the booze on fire after you’ve dipped your fingers in it.