Atlantic Terminal Mall Really Wishes Teens Wouldn’t Hang Out There

by |
09/20/2010 11:06 AM |

Damn kids.
  • Damn kids.

Bruce Ratner’s ugly, stupid Atlantic Terminal mall in downtown Brooklyn, across the street from his ugly, stupid Atlantic Center mall and near the future location of his ugly, stupid Atlantic Yards, is tired of being a mall, apparently, inasmuch as it’s recently instituted policies designed to discourage—nay, to prevent—teens from hanging out there.

Reports the Times:

Groups of four or more people under 21 years old and unaccompanied by a parent are not allowed to linger, lest they become a large unruly group or even an impromptu gathering known as a flash mob.

The policy—enforced more heavily at some times than others, and obviously impossible to circumvent—came about after a number of incidents involving unruly teens, including a flash mob at Buffalo Wild Wings after which a knife fight broke out.

Though obviously peevish, impractical, and counterintuitive, these new restrictions seem to me to be something of a gift to Brooklyn teenagers, who live in the capital of the world, after all, and really ought to be hanging out somewhere cooler than the mall, it’s not like this is fucking South Portland, Maine, where the Maine Mall’s slogan, “Where Else Would You Go?”, is hideously, tauntingly appropriate.