A young scooter was pulverized the other day in DUMBO, and the devastated owner is looking for witnesses to the crime. The chief suspect in the scooter murder is any of the fleet of giant recycling trucks which lumber in and out of the warehouse adjacent to where the scooter was parked. In the words of the owner himself:
I parked my beloved scooter in front of 143 Plymouth Street, at the corner of Pearl, right across the street from Chambers Paper Fibres Corporation. It looked like a safe spot. But when I returned on Monday this week I found my scooter in literally 100 pieces. Crushed multiple times by something huge and heavy—something like the massive garbage trucks that carry the scrap cardboard to Chambers Paper Fibres. I watched a few minutes later as a huge dump truck carrying cardboard ran over what used to be the front of my scooter as he backed into the narrow bay at 143 Plymouth to unload. Right in front of my eyes, as if it were no big deal. I need a witness to help me get restitution. It’s going to cost a lot of money just to dispose of the chassis, and I could be fined $1000.
The owner can be reached at 718-306-9746 or email@example.com. (Nabokov fan!)