Word comes today that a resolution has passed in the city of Pittsburgh that would give Greg Gillis, better known to you as mash-up artist Girl Talk, his own city holiday, which would be known officially as, good lord, “Greg Gillis Day.” Apparently, there wasn’t much notice given, though, as Greg Gillis Day is already upon us! It’s today! And I didn’t even buy a new dress!
This makes us crazy, sort of, because yes, what Jeff said. But it also has us thinking about what would happen if New York City dedicated an official city holiday to every artist who achieved as much success as, and if not more than, Girl Talk. Without even mentioning the very, very obvious Jay-Zs, Beastie Boys and Lou Reeds of the world, here are five that would make at least as much sense as stupid Greg Gillis Day.
Hold Steady Day
On which you get the day off from work specifically so that you can do drugs, almost die, then decide to stick mostly to booze, then listen to 7 Seconds, then listen to Bruce Springsteen, then sit around drinking and reminiscing about that time you did drugs and listened to 7 Seconds.
Vampire Weekend Day
Four Columbia grads release a handful of songs on the internet, a record label bidding war ensues, followed by sold out shows all over the world, magazine covers, a performance on Saturday Night Live and a number one record on the Billboard charts. If that doesn’t get you a holiday, something ain’t right. If it does, though? Horchata, madras, oxford cloth and class warfare all day, with a nice dollop of reckless cross-cultural appropriation all night.
Animal Collective Day
First, there’s the Bedford Avenue parade, where everybody dresses in animal masks and their ugliest sweatshirts, followed by a mass exodus to Panda Bear’s former place of employment, Other Music, to pick up a few soukous records. Revelers return home to listen to them, do some drugs, and contemplate moving to another country. Finally, the night ends at a swanky Manhattan museum to revel at a jungle-like art installation and wonder why the hell Animal Collective is DJing, but not playing live.
Todd P Day
You know, in a way, this guy is probably more responsible than anyone for the sound, or at least the idea, of Brooklyn that has most permeated the imaginations of people all over the world, as he’s booked sweaty, often hard to find DIY shows at various venues across the city (not to mention Austin and Mexico, too) for years now. To celebrate all that he’s accomplished, the city has promised it will not shut down a single venue all day today, not even if there’s seriously nothing going on and the cops are super bored.
They Might Be Giants Day
There are about a hundred of us who believe this should be in the no-brainer category we mentioned earlier, with J-Hova and Lou Reed, but that’s simply not enough. So here: John Linnel and John Flansburgh have lived in Brooklyn since WAY before it was cool, and they’ve been able to sustain a very long career while making some of the most steadfastyly weird and, frankly, uncool music around. Let your freak-flag fly today, people, but please, make sure it’s an actual freak-flag and not one you can buy at like Urban Outfitters or American Apparel or something.
So take that, Pittsburgh. If only someone would make them happen, our bullshit holidays would be much better than your bullshit holidays. Also, Sidney Crosby’s an asshole.