The very helpful website Holiday Alibis sends customized emails to your would-be holiday event host informing them that you won’t be able to attend for one of eight possible reasons, including photographic proof as an attachment. The reasons given range from bed bugs and airport detainment to jury duty and camping out for this year’s hottest toy (in the latter case, an attached image implies that rubber bands are the must-have kids’ thing of 2010). Needless to say, nobody will be excused for holiday season absences thanks to this site, but it certainly speaks to our frequent desire to pick and choose among a set of all-but-obligatory seasonal events. Or, as the site puts it: “This busy holiday season, we’re giving you the best gift of all: more you time.”
The funniest excuse email goes like this:
I’m really sorry, but it looks like I’m not going to be able to make it to your holiday party this year because I’m stuck in a dream within a dream within another dream. The weird part is that you are actually in my dream with me and we are at your party. Although, you have a ferret paw for a face and everyone is actually having a really good time. So, it’s kind of like I’m there. Also, the me from the second level of the dream is also attending your party, but accidentally showed up naked. I’m waiting for the third kick, so if I ever wake up, I’ll give you a call.
Seems plausible, right? (NOTCOT)