It’s been exactly a week since the last batch of complaints from cranky Slopers about the Prospect Park West bike lane. Thankfully, CBS2’s “chief political correspondent” Marcia Kramer has the segment embedded below about how gridlock slows down ambulances (WHAT THE FUCK!?), and how emergency vehicles on PPW at rush hour have no choice but to take the bike lanes to bypass traffic, all of which is somehow caused by the
emergency vehicle bike lane. Don’t worry, though, there’s an easy, cheap and fuel-efficient solution to this: bicycle ambulances (pictured).
Bicycle ambulances rely solely on human power, are less susceptible to traffic jams and gridlock, and can go in bike lanes any time they please! This would presumably contribute to the trend, not cited at any point in the CBS2 story, of declining numbers of accidents, sidewalk cyclists and cars speeding on Prospect Park West since the lane’s installation. The segment also fails to mention that most locals (at least those who aren’t retired local politicians) support the lane.
None of that matters, though; Kramer, predictably compliant interviewee Marty Markowitz and one random dude know how dangerous this bike lane really is to everyone’s well-being. The cherry on top of this shit-show sundae comes with confirmation that former Sanitation Commissioner Norman Steisel’s misleadingly named group Neighbors for Better Bike Lanes is still planning to sue the city Department of Transportation over the bike lane. More, sadly, is sure to come. In the meantime: bike ambulances, think about it.