Remember, If You Don’t Like the New Britney Spears Single, You Are Nothing But Rockist Scum

04/06/2011 12:17 PM |

Oh, what’s that? You can’t believe people (and not even new people—just the same old stupid people as always) are still releasing songs and making videos about dancing all night long? And that people still have not tired of the whole dancing-as-metaphor-for-sex-or-maybe-vice-versa thing? And you don’t understand why you’re supposed to feel like a dick for sort of thinking that, you know, there is so much vocal manipulation and so little actual artistry at play here that this song literally could have been “performed” by any living human being? Pfff, that’s your problem, rockist.

3 Comment

  • I’m with you all the way on wondering why I’m supposed to go out of my way to like less interesting music so as not to appear “rockist” (although in some ways I’m more bothered by the attention Taylor Swift gets for writing her own songs, as if the act of doing so in a world of Britney/Kesha/whoever automatically makes her lyrics not sound like, you know, a teenager wrote them). I would also add some additional points of weirdness: (a.) this is the song that Kesha wrote or cowrote for Britney, right? On one level I get why that happened but on another, the amount that this sounds almost exactly like one of Kesha’s songs underlines your point further. (b.) It is particularly strange that Britney persists in making songs about how much she likes to dance, literally or metaphorically, because she has never looked less interested in dancing than she does at this point in her career.

    That said: this is probably the least annoying Britney song I’ve heard since “Toxic,” although nowhere near as awesome as “Toxic.” And I’m kind of a sucker for songs where it takes two and a half minutes to get to the actual chorus.

  • Yeah, I hear you on the T-Swift thing, but the fact that she writes her own material, including the lyrics, does actually make her more legitimately interesting to me. She says lots of really stupid shit all the time, yes, but at least it’s really stupid shit that’s coming from an actual young person, rather than stupid shit coming from a hired gun who thinks young people are only capable of enjoying stupid shit.

    All that said, you’re right — the heavily auto-tuned (and wordless) chorus is pretty great.