Weinergate: Seriously? This is a thing?

06/02/2011 11:33 AM |


Guys, come on. Are we really going to let a picture of a dude’s clothed crotch be a story? I know it’s the New York Post and that they will freak out about anything, especially if it involves a Democrat, but still. It’s not just them making a fuss.

After days of ducking any questions about the controversy, the six-term married Queens-Brooklyn Democrat finally insisted he did not actually press the send button that launched the soft-core porn into cyberspace.
“I can definitively say that I did not send this,” he told Fox News Channel.
He said someone broke into his account and sent the eye- popping snapshot — showing an erect penis under snug gray boxer briefs — to 21-year-old Gennette Nicole Cordova, a junior-college student in Bellingham, Wash.

Eye-popping soft-core porn? Please. We live in a city where seeing a guy jerking it on the subway is a near-daily occurrence. It’s just embarrassing that anyone is upset about a semi in prudish gray boxer briefs. I mean, American Apparel ads show more cock than that.

Now of course it’s totally inappropriate for anyone to be tweeting unsolicited crotch shots at young ladies. Of course. I think we can all agree that Rep. Weiner did not do that on purpose, if at all. But that’s not the point. The point is, we deserve juicier scandals. Have some pride, New York. Boxer briefs with a minor stiffy is junior varsity-level shit. Like small bible belt town type stuff. I almost suspect journalists are only interested in this because of the possibilities for wiener puns.

Let’s let this one go, okay? It’s beneath us. Also, just a personal request, can we stop appending —gate to anything to indicate that it is a scandal? That makes no sense. Watergate was not a scandal about water. That was the name of the hotel. Am I missing something? I can’t be the only one who is annoyed by this.

Follow me on twitter and I will promise to tweet you only the best dick pics.

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