NYPD to South Brooklyn Women: Stop Wearing Skirts, Problem Solved

09/30/2011 1:20 PM |

This woman doesnt  care about her safety. Stupid.
  • This woman doesn’t care about her safety. Stupid.

Hey ladies of Park Slope, Sunset Park, and Windsor Terrace: good news, the NYPD has fixed that whole sex attacker on the loose problem. No, they didn’t catch the guy. They’ve just decided to let you in on a little safety secret: stop wearing skirts!

According to Lauren, the officer asked if they knew what was going on in the neighborhood. When they answered in the affirmative, he asked if they knew what the guy was looking for.

“He pointed at my outfit and said, ‘Don’t you think your shorts are a little short?'” she recalled. “He pointed at their dresses and said they were showing a lot of skin.”

He said that such clothing could make the suspect think he had “easy access,” said Lauren.

She said the officer explained that “you’re exactly the kind of girl this guy is targeting.”

You’re exactly the kind of girl this guy is targeting, Lauren. A female person who lives in the neighborhood. But hey, says the NYPD spokesperson, don’t get your skirts (or hopefully, pants) all in a bunch, you dumb broads. They aren’t blaming you for wearing slutty clothing, they’re just saying that the guy tends to prefer attacking women wearing skirts and probably especially short skirts even though there’s not actually evidence of that part. But I mean come on!

Asked whether officers were warning women against wearing shorts or skirts, the New York City Police Department responded in no time. “Officers are not telling women what not to wear—there’s a TV series that does that,” quipped Deputy Commissioner Paul Browne in an email. “They are simply pointing out that as part of the pattern involving one or more men that the assailant(s) have targeted women wearing skirts.”

God, you women will get upset about anything! Here the NYPD is just trying to be helpful and you’ve got to go taking it the wrong way. Sure, this guy has attacked upwards of 10 women and they haven’t been able to catch him, and sure, many of those women, including this one caught on video have actually been wearing pants, but still, it’s just common sense that women who dress like whores deserve what they get. Oops, I mean to say that, you know, it’s just obvious that some women are more likely to be targeted and so if you get raped or assaulted it’s sort of your fault. If only you hadn’t been walking around all female and having a vagina, maybe this guy wouldn’t feel compelled to try and force his way into it. Anyways, everyone is really just overreacting to everything! Take it from the Wall Street Journal:

Some think the attention has become alarmist. Most of the assaults were attempts that included groping or grabbing, and didn’t involve weapons. (There was one rape in Sunset Park, in May.)

“Some think” that god, just shut up already. Only one person got raped! That’s like so not a big deal. I mean, I can’t even believe you’re complaining that a guy is running around grabbing and fondling women. He doesn’t even have a weapon! Did you even try to fight back? And anyways, if you haven’t been penetrated it’s barely even a sexual assault. If everyone would just be quiet and dress like ladies, there wouldn’t even be a problem. Just wear pants and never walk alone and stay inside all the time and learn self defense and live in fear and accept the fact that sometimes you’re going to be forcibly fondled. Common sense, girls! I swear, it’s like you’re asking for it sometimes.

2 Comment

  • NYPD needs to spend a little less time prepping to shoot down aircraft and a little more time actually protect New York’s citizenry.

  • No. No. No. And some more no. Is this the NYPD or the goddamn fashion police? CATCH THE DAMN RAPIST. THAT is how you solve the problem, you assholes.