Thanks to 2 Broke Girls, Primetime Television Now Has Far More Terrible Hipster Jokes

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09/20/2011 11:21 AM |

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Last night was the premiere of CBS’ 2 Broke Girls, a Michael Patrick King and Whitney Cummings co-created sitcom about two waitresses (Kat Dennings and Beth Behrs) working at a diner in Williamsburg. Not so many years ago, sitcom characters saw Brooklyn as a Thunderdome-esque hellhole, where laws didn’t exist and graffiti is literally everywhere. On 2 Broke Girls’ Brooklyn, in particular Williamsburg and Greenpoint (where the characters live—JUST LIKE ME!), there’s still a lot of that, but there’s also CBS-friendly hipsters, ones that our mothers will think are HILARIOUS.

The pilot episode wasn’t bad, per se. Dennings, in particular, is fun to watch, even if the rest of the cast, including co-star Behrs, constantly mug for the camera; there’s also a fair number of “he’s funny because he’s Asian” and “he’s funny because he’s sexually harassing Kat Dennings” jokes, but that’s for another time. But it’s portrayal of Hip Brooklyn was exactly what you’d expect from a show by the Sex and the City guy, airing right after Two and a Half Men. Here are some of my favorite quotes, context be damned.

#5. “You can’t wear a fancy leather jacket outside in this neighborhood, you have to turn it inside-out.”
The 2 Broke Girls script, amazingly, was written in 1995. All they did was replace was replace “Pavement” with “Arcade Fire.”

#4. “You think [snapping noise] is a sound that gets you service; I think [snapping noise] is the sound that dries up my vagina.”
If only the women at Kellogg’s spoke to me like this…

#3. “Oh, the Arcade Fire concert from across the street just let out. Good luck with that.”
HAHAHA. Oh man, that’s good. God, we sure do love our across-the-street Arcade Fire shows in Brooklyn, don’t we?

#2. “So, how’d you even up in Brooklyn?” “I went on Monster.com, typed in, ‘Place where nobody on the Upper East Side would ever go ever,’ and this diner came up.”
This has to have been a promotional tie-in with Monster.com, right? Because it’s weird that the show didn’t use Craigslist, the go-to website for the unemployed and broke finding restaurant jobs. Also, I typed in, “Place where nobody on the Upper East Side would ever go ever” under Location, and the top result is “Assembly and Machine Operator Positions In Mt. Sterling, KY.”

#1. “No, hipster. Do not think we’re on the same team. I wear knit hats when it’s cold out; you wear knit hats because of Coldplay.”
Wait, what? Do hipsters listen to Coldplay? Is there a Chris Martin Collective in Brooklyn that I don’t know about? This kind of joke has limitless possibilities: “I’m afraid to see a mouse in my house; you’re afraid that you’ll miss the John Maus concert.” Etc.

3 Comment

  • Whenever people write magazine pieces lamenting the fact that there is no longer any universal mainstream pop culture anymore, they forget that what they are mourning is the passing of clueless, unfunny, can’t-even-be-bothered dogshit like this. It’s what hipsters move to Williamsburg to get away from.

  • Please continue to post an update like this after every episode.

  • I think its funny how Kat Dennings denies being a hipster even though she clearly is one. This show is as bad as Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist. People kept saying how representative of Indie culture it was. Maybe the soundtrack but the movie itself was more in line with wannabe Indie Scene kids.