After all the Hitler jokes that have been made this season, it was only a matter of time before 2 Broke Girls went to South Williamsburg to deal with THE JEWS. Orthodox Jews, at that. Mercifully, there weren’t any jokes about bike lanes (maybe in season four?), but don’t worry, that doesn’t mean it wasn’t totally offensive and lazy anyway.
#5. “Han just unloaded in my mouth.”
Honestly, Han sneezing on Caroline, which is what she’s referring to, is more disgusting than the OTHER “unloaded” meaning. Also, no one would ever phrase it like that in real life, which is why this is such a terrible joke.
#4. “They’ll never know—we’ll just tell them they’re kosher.”
The plot of last night’s episode: Max and Caroline are hired to make cupcakes for a bar mitzvah for an Orthodox family. Max doesn’t respect their traditions… blah blah blah… and she wants to, and does, make NON KOSHER cupcakes. Take that, religious beliefs! Max is supposed to be our relatable “hero,” the one who calls people out on their shit—but in “And the Kosher Cupcakes,” she serves Orthodox Jews non-kosher food because… she’s lazy? Why should we root for her?
#3. “…Rivka Shemshalowitz…”
The laughter comes courtesy of the audience, who thought it was HILARIOUS that an honest-to-God PERSON (and a Jew, at that!) could be named something as hilarious as Rivka. They would have PLOTZED had Shlomo Goldberg made an appearance.
#2. “Damn sweetness, your lips are moving but your ass is doing all the talking.”
That quote was said by one of these kids.
#1. “Max, I told you how important those traditions are to a Jewish family.”
“Yes, you told me about traditions and family, but none of that meant anything until…”
I stopped transcribing the quote after “until” because a) I couldn’t take another inspirational, end-of-the-episode message; and b) those kids from #2 above are still bugging me. One of them is the bat mitzvah boy, and acts like a good little Jew when his mom’s around. But when she leaves, and he and his friend are left alone with Max and Caroline, they refer to themselves as the oh-so-original Jew-Tang Clan, which no other person in HISTORY has ever said, except for the 90,000 search results on Google. They could have at least called themselves the Leaders of the Jew School.