Why I Will Always Side With Rape Accusers Before Knowing the “Facts”

02/09/2012 10:40 AM |

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Yesterday, prosecutors decided that they won’t press charges against Greg Kelly, son of police commissioner Ray Kelly. He was accused of raping a woman—I wrote about it here. I sounded pretty sure I believed he was guilty. As far as the courts are concerned, there wasn’t enough evidence to indict him. Am I sorry? No.

And I’m not sorry about calling Dominique Strauss-Kahn, who was found not guilty of rape in a court of law, a rapist. And the next time someone comes forward saying he or she was raped by another someone, whether that person is a powerful government official or a friend, I will always, ALWAYS believe the accuser. I will always support him or her even before I know all of the “facts” of the situation, or, more likely, have heard the two sides, and probably after. Why? Because we live in a culture so permissive to rapists and so punishing to rape survivors that to do anything else would be monstrous.

The Post published a picture of Kelly’s accuser yesterday, identifying her by name. They did the same to the woman who accused two cops of raping her. They called Nafi Diallo, or, as you may know her “the maid,” of being a liar, a sex worker, a gold digger, a drug dealer. They have, in the words of Intel’s Joe Coscarelli, engaged in “a bullying tactic that could prevent women from reporting sexual abuse crimes.” This is not the exception. This is the norm.

Greg Kelly, by the way, was deemed unchargable not because he didn’t rape his accuser, but because it would be impossible to prove that she was, as she claimed, too intoxicated to consent. This is what rape culture is. And what it means to the women who live in it is that they live with the very real possibility—a one in five chance—that they too will face the same impossible choice: stay quiet, live with what happened, watch your rapist walk around free, or accuse him or her, and have your entire life dragged through the mud. Have every single choice you’ve ever made examined publicly to see if maybe it’s your “fault” that this happened. Be put on trial—publicly—in a way your rapist will never, ever will be.

Let me tell you about two of my friends who had terrible things happen to them. The first is a man. He was falsely accused of rape by a woman he was friends with. He had never slept with her. She later recanted and told everyone the truth of what (hadn’t) happened. He is still living with the consequences of that action today: it made it very hard for him to trust women, to be sexually open. It really fucked him up. He did nothing wrong.

The second friend is a woman. In college, she was raped by a man she was on a date with. The man’s older brother was very important in the ROTC of that college. On this campus, the ROTC was very powerful, and had a strong reputation for honor and excellence. When she came forward about what happened to her, she was called a liar and a slut. The ROTC members embarked on a campaign of harassment that forced her to drop out of college. Nothing happened to the man. The administration of the college refused to get involved. She also did nothing wrong.

I am truly, deeply sad for both of these friends. I really do understand the harm a false rape accusation can do to a person. It can ruin someone’s life. But it still does not compare to the damage that rape can do. And unfortunately, rape is more common by a factor of hundreds. If you think you don’t know someone who was raped, you are probably wrong. Many rape victims are never able to come forward about what happened to them.

When the Post goes out of its way to punish women who speak up about rape, women everywhere hear and understand the message: stay in line. Be quiet. It’ll be easier for you if you just lie back and take it. Here is another story that I happened to come across yesterday, just in the normal course of reading the internet.

I was, as a teenager, locked in a room with my rapist by school administrators and told, “Don’t come out until you’ve worked out your differences.” He spent the entire time threatening to kill me, my family, and my dogs, if I ever reported anything he ever did to me again. When the head counselor eventually came back to that room, I was asked if we’d managed to work things out, and I confirmed that we had.

Because I would have said anything to get the fuck out of that room.

He raped me again and again over the next three years.

Again, this is not the exception. It is the rule. If you go looking, you can find hundreds, thousands of variations on this story. I understand why people don’t want to accept this truth: it’s horrible. Nobody wants to think it is their mom, their sister, their friend who things like this happen to. Better and easier to think that she’s lying or that she somehow deserved what she got. For women, it’s a way of warding off evil. Maybe if I can figure out what she did “wrong” I can avoid her fate. Did she dress slutty? Get drunk? Go home with a stranger? Wear headphones? It is tempting to think that if you are a good girl and do everything “right,” you’ll be safe. The truth is that in this culture, nobody is safe.

Even so, we look for reasons to excuse the rapist, to mitigate the horror. Even in the most cut-and-dried “honest rape” cases, and even in the New York Times, the blame is shifted.

Roxane Gay, in her amazing essay The Careless Language of Sexual Violence, examines the case of an eleven-year-old girl gang raped by 18 men:

The Times article was entitled, “Vicious Assault Shakes Texas Town,” as if the victim in question was the town itself. James McKinley Jr., the article’s author, focused on how the men’s lives would be changed forever, how the town was being ripped apart, how those poor boys might never be able to return to school. There was discussion of how the eleven-year-old girl, the child, dressed like a twenty-year-old, implying that there is a realm of possibility where a woman can “ask for it” and that it’s somehow understandable that eighteen men would rape a child. There were even questions about the whereabouts of the mother, given, as we all know, that a mother must be with her child at all times or whatever ill may befall the child is clearly the mother’s fault. Strangely, there were no questions about the whereabouts of the father while this rape was taking place.

The overall tone of the article was what a shame it all was, how so many lives were affected by this one terrible event. Little addressed the girl, the child. It was an eleven-year-old girl whose body was ripped apart, not a town. It was an eleven-year-old girl whose life was ripped apart, not the lives of the men who raped her. It is difficult for me to make sense of how anyone could lose sight of that and yet it isn’t.

These little things, these seemingly unimportant things like tone and word choice, like hate rags publishing pictures of rape victims, like all of the tiny ways that we, every day, as culture, signal to potential rapists to go ahead, it’s not so bad, she probably wants it anyway, wink wink. That is rape culture. There’s no neutral ground. You are either fighting hard against it—speaking up to defend rape victims, not laughing at rape jokes, refusing to accept the excuses people make for rapists—or you are part of it. Silence abets rapists. And THAT is why I will always take the side of the person making a rape accusation, and why you should too. When the playing field is level, I will wait to be vocal. I’ll listen to both sides, or just stay out of it altogether. But in a world where trying to bring your rapist to justice puts you in line for something that might be more difficult to endure than the rape itself, victims need all the support they can get.

56 Comment

  • Please don’t serve on a jury. Ever.

  • You do know that :
    A. Receipts at the bars and security cameras at the apartment showed that
    1. Kelly’s accuser didn’t have much to drink
    2. Was able to stand on her own two feet, hardly “stumbling around drunk”.

    But more to the point there’s your ignorance about just how much damage false claims of rape can cause. People have been KILLED over false rape claims. Or one can end up in jail getting REPEATEDLY raped over a period of months or years. Assuming you are a decent person, you do not support either of these outcomes.
    As for me? I go where the evidence seems to take me on a case by case basis. I find the tabloid press eager to use and destroy everyone and anyone for money, which is why I support anonymity for both accuser and accused.

    Clarence

  • I usually agree with Ference but this post is a disaster. Basically, the gist is, ‘I’ll believe the same thing on Weds that I believed on Monday, regardless of what I learned on Tuesday, because I’m so goshdarn mad.’

  • I dispute none of that. But false rape claims, yeah, those happen too unfortunately andbut it isto shockingly naive to not realize that, unless you do realize that but didn’t write it because it contradicts your thesis. What’s craziest about this article is that you are a journalist who proudly states you disregard the facts (quotations or not).

  • *and it is shockingly

  • No one respects the NY Post but we still believe that putting a alleged crime victim’s photograph on the cover, calling her ‘shady’ and putting the word rape in quotes perpetuates the stereotype that women are making up their rapes. We don’t claim to know what happened in this case or any specific case, but character assassination of this young woman is not fair. In addition, it feeds a cultural stereotype that makes it (even) harder for people (especially women) to report rape and sexual assault.

    Please like the page and share if you agree. We are reaching out to media later in the day and could use all the support we can get.

    http://www.facebook.com/shameonthenypost

  • people who think ‘false’ rape claims are so prevalent must also keep in mind that women are often forced, pressured, threatened, attacked, doubted, or publicly humiliated so intensely that they recant, even when the accusation they make is true. i am always alarmed to hear from men who say that they (or a male friend) have had false accusations lodged against them MORE THAN ONCE.

  • I never said it was prevalent but this article says it NEVER happens.

  • @Adam Garland

    I wouldn’t worry about the jury thing. Rapes seldom go to trial. Can’t imagine why.

  • This is such a great article – thank you for writing it.

  • Mark Asch:
    The only way you can be sure that “rapes seldom go to trial” is if you :
    A. Compose surveys such as Koss that take things that the victims themselves don’t describe as rape and classify them as rape thus inflating rape numbers
    B. Believe every time someone says they were raped they really were, regardless of the alleged reason they have for not reporting it to the police.

    It’s a fact that about a little over half the time when rapes do make it to trial there is a conviction. Beyond that, we don’t know very much.

  • I know. Mine didn’t go to trial either. As a person who has been raped, articles like this devastate me. Its such an important subject and sensationalizing it doesn’t help our cause. This could have been a beautiful and nuanced article but instead it’s driven by emotion rather than rational thought.

  • there is absolutely no reason to ask people, especially women (the overwhelming targets and ‘losers’ in rape culture), to be 100% rational when discussing an issue that is not devoid of emotion and about which there is a societal bias to skew the perception and reporting away from their favor. it’s asinine and a strawman argument and a common tactic used by men to discredit and downplay trauma women experience overwhelmingly and disproportionately.

    adam garland, it would serve you well to actually read this article. she does NOT say that false accusations never happen. in fact, she discusses a specific example of a male friend being falsely accused of rape.

  • 1. Women don’t have a monopoly on rape.
    2. Read the headline again.

  • I’m very sorry to hear that.

    But it’s head-bangingly frustrating that you accuse this article of lacking nuance, when in one of your earlier comments makes the laughably false assertion “this article says [false accusations of rape] NEVER happen”. Did you skip the paragraph about Audrey’s friend, who was falsely accused of rape?

    And then we have people dropping by who seem to have a very good idea of the accuser’s tolerance for alcohol, so, like, QED. Audrey’s point, which is a pretty subtle one, is that, rape accusations frequently being as you know a very murky he-said/she-or-he-said situation, any attempt to find the truth, via trial or otherwise, is obscured by people who’ll go out of their way to avoid taking the accusation seriously enough to find out.

  • Mark, you’re right. I missed that. I gotta pretty heated.

  • Sure. I can see why; I sort of did too. And I think there’s a legitimate discussion to be had, as in any issue of cultural/political attitudes, about the value of what you call, not entirely inaccurately, “sensationalism.”

    I will just say that I didn’t take “side with” to necessarily to mean “believe blindly.” I think it has to do with reversing cultural biases that actively permit, if not encourage rape–I think Audrey does well here to connect what the NY POST does (routinely!) to larger issues. To the kind of attitudes that would have her apologize for taking rape accusations seriously.

  • I’m entirely in sympathy with Ference’s anger about the way rape victims (or “possible victims,” I guess, technically speaking) are routinely harassed and belittled. But to assert that waiting to be better informed before rushing to defend an accusation is “monstrous” is…well, ludicrous.

    “Because African-Americans still face an uphill struggle due to centuries of entrenched racism, as an employer, in cases where a white applicant and a black applicant seem more or less equally qualified, I will always hire the black applicant” = reasonable, even laudable.

    “Because African-Americans still face an uphill struggle due to centuries of entrenched racism, as an employer, in cases where a white applicant and a black applicant apply for the same position, I will always hire the black applicant without interviewing either candidate or even glancing at their respective rsums” = indefensible.

    Ference’s position as stated above is much closer to the latter.

  • (That mystery word was meant to be “resumes.” Accented characters got lost in cut-and-paste.)

  • This is one of the most amazing, powerful posts I have every read, and thank you so much for posting it. It’s incredibly important, and all true. Anyone who doesn’t agree, or at least understand it, has their head so far stuck down in the sand I’m worried about their oxygen flow. I’m sure it’ll get trolled, but what else would you expect? If anything, all the trolls only confirm the truth of this piece.

  • Much as I hate rapists (I firmly believe in a special castration clause in their sentencing), any kind of conviction without due process is a step backwards, towards witch hunts and McCarthy-ism. The facts should be heard, and guilty testes should be removed.

  • Roxy; you’d do well to lose the attitude that all women never lie about rape or assault. I don’t doubt that many women may actually have experienced exactly what you had suggested, sure, but the thing you either haven’t understood or don’t want to understand is the ease at which a woman can falsely accuse a man.

    The very thing which the author of this article suggests is the issue which undermines rape victims, victims who are hurting, victims who have been scarred for life. To see a woman engage in an act and then cry rape when it didn’t really happen. You want to know what disturbs me? Seeing men cleared of rape with overwhelming evidence to which supports their innocence and then having people STILL maintaining their guilt regardless.

    That is in a word, disgusting, no matter how you slice it.

    I’m not stating this for the rights of rapists, or potential rapists. Not even close, I’m stating all of this for the rights of men who get falsely accused and then have to suffer from people stating that if they or anyone else complains about it that they support rape. As someone else has stated, if anyone disagrees, they have their head up their heinie, the same can be said for anyone who supports the jailing of clearly innocent men and allowing false accusers leniency is a victim of the same crime.

    You are asking, no DEMANDING that no matter what is accused, take whatever is given to you, even if you are accused of something when you weren’t even in the same room.

    If anyone hates rape like they claim too, then why on Earth would ANYONE support a position that the author has done? False Rape Claims cheapen the real ones and casts doubt on the real victims. Why aren’t women raging at the false accusers who are tying up court resources and making light of the act of rape? Has anyone ever considered what it would feel like when you are trying to get over such a horrific and life changing event such as rape and some random woman claims that they suffered from it too and there isn’t even a shred of evidence to back it up?

    False Rape claims hurt everybody, men, women, EVERYBODY.

  • Typical feminist sexism.

  • You complain about women having there names and pictures posted yet you have done exactly the same to Mark Kelly.

    Also look up the precise meaning of the word bigot.

  • Anthony Zarat:
    Feminists cannot be sexist. We have no leverage with which to oppress men. Women can be prejudiced or discriminatory against men (neither of which exist in this article) but since we cannot possibly in this society OPPRESS MEN, we cannot be sexist.
    I know it must be really rough for you to see an overwhelmingly male government attempt to pass legislation limiting our control over our own bodies or when we can and cannot access contraceptives. It must also be rough to have women stick up for other women who have been systematically told that their pain or oppression isn’t so bad after all. We are told that. Every day, by people like you. “Typical.” Don’t you hate it when ‘lesser’ people recognize that the status quo is bullshit, and then try to do something about it? Won’t someone think of the bigots?

  • Alcohol takes about 15 minutes to really affect a person. Who knows how “stumbling” drunk she was 5 minutes after she left the bar? I also have friends that look and act completely sober when they are actually black out drunk. And every single person has a different alcohol threshold. I know men and women who feel drunk after one beer while I, a 5’4″ thin woman, can pound the gin and tonics and stumble home just fine on my own. You can not compare your abilities under the influence to any other person. I have been told that when I black out, I act sober. I have also stumbled home on dates too intoxicated bc I didn’t eat enough for dinner and that last half beer hits me hard. In this lass scenario I was almost date raped. We need to be less judgmental and more concerned.

  • Hannah: Virtually all feminists are sexist bigots.

  • Example 1 of feminist bigotry:
    ******************************

    Feminist lie: “And what it means to the women who live in it is that they live with the very real possibility

  • I believe that there is a great majority of people out there, especially women, that actually expect actions that many would consider rape. Why? Because it is considered ‘normal’ behavior within our society. The second night my ex-girlfriend and I hung out, we fell asleep on the couch watching movies. In the morning she left. We did nothing but kiss. A few months into our relationship she admitted to me that back when she woke up after that night she was surprised to wake up with her clothes on. I asked her what she meant by that and why she would think that. She said that she more or less expected to wake up with out her clothes on. Apparently, she had been in that situation before, waking up with a guy with her clothes off and not knowing what had happened. Perhaps it was because it was a common occurrence. That it was OK. Perhaps it was because women are made to believe that they are the ones to blame. There is no one defining reason why she would think that it was OK to wake up with her clothes off without her consent. To any of you that think that being a victim of false rape claim is just as bad as actually being raped, FUCK OFF! There is no comparison to the physical AND mental suffering that a true rape victim endures. And there are way too many true rape victims that are living with their secret. Afraid because people will not side with her, that she had it coming to her, that it was her fault. It’s very sad to see people trying to drown out the problem of actual rape by focusing on victims of false rape claims. Yes that may be a problem as well, but I’ve only heard of a ‘false rape claim’ once in my life, and who’s to say that one was a not legitimate rape claim. That is a much smaller problem and yes it should not be swept under the rug, but it should never take away focus from bigger issue of rape and why it is so prevalent.

  • Anthony, check your facts again. It clearly states, ‘Too few men reported rape in the 12 months prior to taking the survey to produce a reliable 12 month prevalence estimate.’ The stat that you stated for number of rapes on men by women was for in the men’s ENTIRE lifetime.

    1,581,000 – men raped by women in their lifetime
    21,840,000 – women raped by men in their lifetime

  • I didn’t really think about rape at all until few years ago. Then it happened.
    I was in the club, i seen this girl i knew from a while back, she had some ltr with a guy i also knew. She was mad with him at the moment and he wasnt there so she went home with me. End of story.
    Well, about week later her pissed off boyfriend attacks me for “raping” his girlfriend. I had some friends floating around at that party, so they saved my ass, i only got away with bruised face but could be lot worse.
    And what happened that night, really?
    1)She didn’t drink. In fact, I was the one drinking that night.
    2)She came to my home willingly.
    3) She put condom on me.
    4) She rode me during good part of the intercourse.
    And I guess most important thing. 5) I didn’t contact her in any way after.
    So in her sick mind that constitutes rape?

  • @Anthony that CDC report makes no mention of men being raped by women. “Approximately 1 in 21 men reported being made to penetrate SOMEONE ELSE in his lifetime.” (emphasis mine)

  • Yurp. nice to know you’ve choosen to abandoned your critical thinking and reasoning powers.

    I’m not going to argue that our society isn’t sexist, but I know that the cure isn’t more sexism.

  • In a related story, I got a DUI last week. I hit someone, although they were only slightly injured.

    As my defense, I plan to say that I was too drunk to remember consenting to driving the car home.

  • joe E Bee

    Check YOUR facts again. When a woman forces a man to “envelop” her, it is not considered rape. It is considered “other sexual violence”. Feminist worked hard for years to make sure that women CANNOT be accused of raping a man, because when a woman rapes a man, it is not called rape. Is this clear enough, or do you need me to explain again?

    The number that is “too low to estimate” is women who penetrate men. Women do not rape by penetration. Women rape by envelopment. The statistics are clear and irrefutable. Your attempt to derail these facts speaks to your own sexist view of criminal accountability.

    Once again, here are the FACTS reported in the 2011 CDC National Intimate Partner And Sexual Violence Survey, page 18 and 19:

    1,270,000 completed rapes OF women BY men in 2011 (table 2.1)
    1,267,000 completed rapes OF men BY women in 2011 (table 2.2)

    Here is how the feminist survey describes these facts:

    “Approximately 1 in 21 men (4.8%) reported having been made to penetrate someone else in his lifetime (Table 2.2).”

    That is IT. They never even mention, anywhere in the text, the starling FACT that in 2011, THE SAME NUMBER OF WOMEN RAPED MEN, AS MEN RAPED WOMEN. That means, in the most recent year (which is the only thing that matters to prevention), women and men rape with equal frequence. They are equally likely to be perpetrators, and equally likely to be victims. Can I say this in a more clear way?

    Sorry, I mean the same number of women “force men to have sex with thim, even though, according to feminists, this is not rape, beause when it happens to a man it is called something else.”

  • You shouldn’t side with anyone until you know the facts.

    The fact is, a woman can say ANYTHING she wants, and the cops will act on it, and arrest an innocent man based on those allegations. I know because it happened to me; all because I caught my ex with drugs and another guy. Jail and thousands of dollars later, the case was dropped because she never showed to court.

    It is just as serious an offense to lie about a rape as it is to commit one. Lives can be ruined on both sides on both occasions.

  • Audrey Ference will always be a misandrist pile of sow droppings. And, some day it will happen to him.

  • To Anthony Zarat and everyone else thinking similarly:

    Although I understand what you’re trying to say (and I would agree that a man being forced to penetrate a women does constitute a rape), I feel that the way you make your argument is counterproductive for several reasons.

    First, you can’t directly compare only the yearly reports of men being forcibly penetrated to the number of women that were raped in a year without including additional numbers on both sides. The definition of rape used by the report is far to narrow for both men and women. A lot of what is lumped under “other sexual violence” does in fact constitute rape. This means that a lot of numbers would be added to BOTH sides of rape statistics if we were to compare them by sex or gender. You can’t simply pick two lines and compare them, although I understand why you highlighted the one you did. I agree that the report’s presentation of the statistics could be improved. The FBI recently changed its definition of rape because it previously did not include many of those things categorized under “other sexual violence,” and also did not allow for men to be included in the definition. This is the type of progress we should aim for.

    I also think it’s unreasonable to describe the CDC, that is the Center for Disease Control, survey as being subject to undue “feminist” influence, especially when there is representation of men on the team that put out the report.

  • More importantly, you’re missing the point and the bigger picture.

    The way you are making your argument seems to suggests that you believe that women make rape out to be a bigger issue to them than it actually is, and are somehow trying to use and manipulate it. By vilifying feminists (whom you associate with all women) and accusing them of “lying,” you’re justifying the very mindset of rapists (which is counterproductive for both men and women).
    ******Progress for men should not come at the expense of women, just as progress for women should not come at the detriment of men.******
    I understand that you’re trying to defend men, but you don’t have to hurt women to do it.
    Yes, men as sexual assault survivors are just as marginalized as female survivors but that is a cause of SOCIETY and the constructs developed over the years, not because feminists are trying to manipulate the way people see things.

    I’m a MALE and I’m also a FEMINIST. These are things that are NOT mutually exclusive if you understand the meaning of feminism. I’m also a sexual assault educator and we do a lot of work to establish gender neutrality, because rape is something that affects both men and women.
    Instead of trying to disregard the arguments of the opposite sex we, both men and women, should be united in ending rape.

  • Anthony Zarat,

    You seem like an educated person, which is why I am dumbfounded by some of your comments. You have cited the NISVS Report, specifically the tables 2.1 and 2.2 found on page 18 and 19 of the report.

    However, you ASSUME that the same number of women who were raped by men is the same number of men who were raped by women. No where does it say that 1,267,000 men were raped by women. You labeled the table yourself without thinking that maybe some if not most of the rapes were MALE ON MALE. Consider this, the US Crime Victimization Survey of 2005 found that 99% of rapes were committed by men. Did you get that? 99% (Sure, it’s a 7 year old study. But trends have not changed in the past 7 years. In fact, trends have not changed for over 25 years based on the statistics from government organizations.) That means that in no way is it possible that women raped men as often as men raped women.

    If I have offended you, I understand. You probably have offended some people reading your comments. But please be more careful when citing a scholarly literature review.

  • Wow! Breathing a sigh of relief just knowing that one person will publicly stand up for the victim of rape. Rarely does a rape victim speak up because of fears, conditiong by our culture and media reminding us what happends if you do say a word. Worse, when it’s incest, who will listen? Who will believe? Certainly not the parent who values her husband, her brother, her son and herself above the victim, too much at stake to act on such an accusation as this. When it’s a church member, same thing, who will believe it? I have seen it in other families. I have seen it in faith based “residential homes for wayward teens”. I have seen it in my own family. Very few victims ever find their voice, the victim has to be strong enough and willing to lose family, church members or any other social circle the peadophile and victim belongs to, to bring accusations against the rapist. I know too many rape victims who have never gone to authorities for many reasons as mentioned in this article. For most of us, by the time we find our voice, it’s too late when the statute of limitations has expired. People need to educate themselves on the statistic, few are raped by a stranger. To rape a stranger is too risky, the victim most likely will report it immediatly, having the evidence on hand, to be tried and convicted if the victim is able to escape alive. This type of rape is rare, the victim has nothing to lose, no love loss, with no emotional ties to a stranger rapist. Most rapes occure by someone known to the victim usually someone we are suppose to love and trust, hard to turn someone you love in for rape, hard to be shamed and blambed by the rest of the family who is suppose to love and support you, so we live in the shadows alone knowing the truth. What I know about this subject and the many victims and the many rapists, leaves me to suspect anyone who ignores or deny any of this to be true are most likely someone I would NOT trust around my own children and grandchildren. If those who disagree out of sheer ignorance, then educate yourself before taking any personal defense. And further more, ask yourself “what would I do if my daughter or son claims rape by the dad, a brother, cousin, grandpa or uncle?” This is reality.

  • lifeasweknowit,

    I noticed you said the CDC isn’t influenced by feminism because it has men on its team.

    “I also think it’s unreasonable to describe the CDC, that is the Center for Disease Control, survey as being subject to undue “feminist” influence, especially when there is representation of men on the team that put out the report.”

    You then went on to state that you’re a male feminist.

    Did it ever occur to you that the “men” on the CDC might be ardent followers of feminazism?

    Are you sane enough to realise that men do not necessarily look out for the best interests of other men?

    Considering your first claim is based on the premiss that men put men’s interests ahead of women’s interests, I’d say the answer to both questions could be ‘no’. The reason I say “could be” is because I’m not convinced that you’re so stupid as to believe your drivel. A person doesn’t have to win a Nobel prize to know that the average man places women’s interests ahead of other men’s interests: ever wondered why men fuss over women in distress but tend to ignore men in distress? A man might put his own interests ahead of women’s interests, but to think that means he’s going to give a stuff about the man who lives up the right is so foolish that only a retard could be stupid enough to believe it! The average politician is a man who only cares about getting elected and keeping his seat in parliament. In order to do that he needs to win over women: women are more likely than men to rally together and vote for the candidate who supports their gender’s agenda. Don’t think that the politicians aren’t aware of it. They pander to women all of the time. It’s why politicians do nothing about issues that affect men disproportionately more than women (IE. suicide, life expectancy, general health, education, legalised discrimination in the courts, Etc.) If men truly rallied together for men’s intersts, which is what you and your half-witted friend Hannah tried to suggest, then they’re failing miserably.

    “I’m a MALE and I’m also a FEMINIST. These are things that are NOT mutually exclusive if you understand the meaning of feminism. I’m also a sexual assault educator and we do a lot of work to establish gender neutrality, because rape is something that affects both men and women.”

    You obviously think you’re smart enough to fool people by making unsubstantiated accusations that are meant to appeal to people’s emotions (IE. you equating activism against women who make false rape accusations as an attack on women), but the truth is you’re just an evil, self-serving prick who uses the “I’m a male feminazi” line as a means of getting closer to dumb, hateful, uneducated young women that you want to fuck.

    “Instead of trying to disregard the arguments of the opposite sex we, both men and women, should be united in ending rape.”

    Like I said above, you’re just an evil, self-serving prick who uses the “I’m a male feminazi” line as a means of getting closer to dumb, hateful, uneducated young women that you want to fuck. I really hope you’re diagnosed with a terminal illness within the next two weeks.

  • Anyone who advocates castration for rapists is a either a psycho or a retard. Castration is infinitely worse than a man raping a woman.

    There’s no crime that’s more exaggerated than man-on-woman vaginal rape. The majority of women who are raped by men do not fall pregnant or contract a fatal STD. All forms of violent crime have the potential to cause PSTD. For example, a study from David Finkelhor and Janis Wolak found that boys who are kicked in the testes are more susceptible to developing PSTD and social anxiety, which are the very same symptoms that rape victims can experience. I bet none of the manhaters nutbags (IE. Hannah) and manginas are going to start advocating the amputation of the feet of women who kick innocent men in the testes…

    I’d argue that testicular abuse is worse than a man raping a woman. Only 50 kg of force is required to rupture the tunica albuginea. A ruptured testis needs to have its damaged tissue excised (debridement). Children are regularly admitted to the emergency room for this procedure after sustaining a blow from a pupil. A man can die of neurogenic shock when he’s hit in the testes. A woman can contract HIV from a rapist, but only if she doesn’t take antiretroviral medication after the attack. There is no cure for men who develop neurogenic shock after a blow to the testes.

    So people, think twice before you trot out the ‘rape is a fate worse than death’ horseshit. Only a retarded simpleton would be stupid enough to think that unwanted sex is worse than violent to the generative organs.

  • @ The Truth

    “There’s no crime that’s more exaggerated than man-on-woman vaginal rape.”

    “I’d argue that testicular abuse is worse than a man raping a woman.”

    Interesting premise! Maybe you should experience the receiving end of both and get back to us with a comparison?

  • “Maybe you should experience the receiving end of both and get back to us with a comparison?”

    You know very well that the overwhelming majority of people assume that man-on-woman vaginal rape is worse than testicular abuse. You’re probably one of them. If I hadn’t have offered an in-depth analysis explaining that testicular abuse causes more harmful side-effects than man-on-woman vaginal rape then you would probably be saying that a) rape is worse and that b) anyone who thinks otherwise is insane.

    Men need to learn that just because women say that “rape is a fate worse than death” doesn’t mean it’s the case. If a woman was tied up by Ted Bundy and told she had to either allow him to fuck her or allow him to batter her vulva severely or allow him to give her a clitorectomy/vulvectomy or allow him to kill her then 90% of the time she would choose to be fucked: women who get off on BDSM would choose to have the perpetrator torture her vulva, but only because they’re masochistic enough to derive pleasure from extreme pain and humiliation. The rest would would drop their knickers and tell the perpetrator to get the fucking over and done with. The feminazis and female supremacists on here know they would do they same if Ted Bundy put them in that situation, but they won’t admit it because they want dumb, easily manipulated men to believe the myth that all women are virtuous angels who value their “chastity” more than life itself — the same women who probably claim it’s okay for a woman to be a reckless slut, have numerous abortions on demand and have numerous affairs with different men because that’s what “strong” womyn do!

  • Thank you so much for writing this article. Its everything I’ve ever felt about our culture in regards to rape articulated the way I never could. I recall the case about the 11 year old girl and had been horrified by how it was covered in the media. We have got to stop blaming the victims.

  • “Only a retarded simpleton would be stupid enough to think that unwanted sex is worse than violent to the generative organs.”

    @The Truth, unwanted sex IS violence to the generative organs.

  • “@The Truth, unwanted sex IS violence to the generative organs.”

    Do you even know what generative organs are?

    They’re testes and ovaries.

    The ovaries are not on the receiving end of violent trauma during sex. The only sexual activity that could lead to the ovaries enduring a forceful blow from an erect penis is during anal sex, but that’s hardly the type of sex that rapists use against women.

  • “when the playing field is level”

    Would that also include the playing field where sex is controlled by women and begged for by men, because in my opinion, the way that sex is withheld and distributed as a commodity of the female is one of the prime causes for rape. Men are sensual beings who shouldn’t have to still go through with these awful rituals of strength in order to get something (sex) that is vital to their good emotional health.

    You never ever hear of a woman saying that this facet of male-female relationships needs to change.

  • Soooo… basically men ain’t shit and will ALWAYS be wrong. Got it. Next article.

  • Audrey, did you write that drivel because you’re trying to get a rise, or are you genuinely a moron?

  • “I really do understand the harm a false rape accusation can do to a person. It can ruin someone’s life. But it still does not compare to the damage that rape can do.” Do you really understand, Audrey?

    Tim Cole was a young African-American army veteran and student at Texas Tech U. who was convicted for raping a fellow student in 1985 and sentenced to 25 years based solely on his identification by the victim, and despite overwhelming evidence that he didn’t do it. He didn’t; but his complete exoneration came too late. Tim, by all accounts exactly the type of male role model the Black community is sorely missing, died in prison in 1999.

    Mr. Ference, deny it though you will, your misandrous gender-biased attitude endorses and enables the terrible injustice done to Tim Cole and so many other victims unjustly accused of rape, and makes their suffering invisible. You owe Tim’s family, and your outraged readers, an explanation of how this fine young Black man’s years of brutal Texas incarceration and premature death pale in comparison to that of a female survivor of rape? For obvious reasons no group more deeply resents and decries false and superficial rape allegations

  • I am sure Wanetta Gibson and Stevie Rochelle Bamford appreciate your support. Without the unwavering belief of people like you Ms Ference, I am sure they would have never had the confidence to report their cases to the police:

    http://www.brisbanetimes.com.au/world/sydney-tourist-jailed-for-false-rape-claim-20120616-20gq7.html

    http://thewilfreds.com/2012/05/see-how-wanetta-gibson-profited-1-5-for-putting-innocent-brian-banks-in-prison/