Because New Yorkers love nothing more than being forced to talk to (and make eye contact with) strangers on the subway, the L train now has a self-appointed “Love Conductor” who approaches strangers she thinks might be single, and calls them out on it. So, in addition to dirty old men and handsy teenagers, another thing to be concerned about on the commute. Also, the “L” train now stands for “Love Train,” according to the New York Post. So much good news in one day!
Per a rare Brooklyn trend piece in the Post, 31-year-old Erika Christensen has actually started a small business out of train-based matchmaking, charging between $39 and $456 per month for her services, which include date planning and all those things people supposedly hate doing for themselves. But first, she has to find her clients, which usually involves accosting strangers on the train, with mixed results.
One person she approached on the Post‘s ride-along just looked “startled,” the other poured out all her hopes and dreams for meeting a “funny, artistic lumberjack.” Which is another problem altogether.
But anyway, I guess it makes a little sense, sort of. The L train has become kind of a notorious hub for attractive people and prolific missed connections, after all. That, and everyone wants to get laid. So the “Love Conductor” is, in fact, coming from a place vaguely based on reality.
The really insurmountable problem here is that her creeping might interfere with our creeping. According to Christensen, a favorite technique is to jump in on two people who may or may not be eyeing each other and tell them, “I don’t know if you people are single, but you are clearly enjoying the sight of each other.” Does anyone want to be called out like that, in front of total strangers? Can we even begin to count the number of ways that could go terribly, terribly wrong? No, we do not, and no, we cannot.
Follow Virginia K. Smith on Twitter @vksmith.