What the Fuck is a Squatty Potty? Would You Pay $80 for One?

01/18/2013 9:00 AM |

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Like always, I was just minding my own business at the office today, when a weird new banner ad plopped into my lap, advertising the life-changing services of a footstool-looking device called the Squatty Potty. “Enjoy freedom from being toiled bound,” they said. They also offered the opportunity to tweet the ad with the trending topic “#amazingdump” and a link. What fresh joy is this? Am I really about to change the way I poop (or “eliminate,” per their terminology)… forever? Is it worth it to shell out the extra $20 for the “Tao Bamboo” model instead of the “Classic,” or is this all an elaborate poop ruse?

Unclear. It seems that thousands of these things have already been sold, and their medical-sounding promises that use of the Squatty will “unkink your rectum taking you from a continent mode to elimination mode” sound very official. The sleek, Steve Jobs-y informational video with lots of infographics and revelatory statements about the sorry state of modern-day pooping is quite a thing to behold, as well.

Is it time we unload all our preconceived notions about toilet-using posture (and time I unloaded all of my very lamest puns about feces), or do internet analytics just send me terrible, terrible ads?

Follow Virginia K. Smith on Twitter @vksmith.