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AT A LIVE GAME
12. Consider having a drink or two at home or at a nearby bar before heading to the arena. It is a well known fact that slightly drunk sports fans are way better and funnier and smarter than totally sober sports fans. But seriously, you're not made of money, right?
13. Choose an epithet to yell non-stop at the refs.
14. Pick a favorite Brooklynette: may we recommend Flatbush's own Melissa Timothy-Tozer? Her signature move is something called a "kip-up," which, yeah. KIP-UP!
15. Get there on time. This isn't Madison Square Garden, you know.
16. But that said, if you happen to be there on a business meeting, please, no work-related talk while the game is being played—for the sake of your business and so that the people around you don't get pissed off and remind you that, again, this is not Madison Square Garden, you know.
17. Sacrifice the last two minutes of the first-half and head to the bathroom in order to beat the halftime rush. It is absolutely worth it.
18. As for the second half, you're only allowed one more bathroom trip, tops. Any more and you'll risk bothering the people around you and/or seeming a little bit like a child. Control yourself.