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1. Don't Crowd Around Both Sides of the Doors
Look, I get it, I'm losing my mind. Pathologically, I spend half of my day trying to figure out the most efficient ways to do everything I'm doing so other people aren't inconvenienced. For boarding the subway, I came up with this easy one: let's all stand to one side of the car doors—the side not on the way to the station exit—when waiting to get on, so the people getting out don't have to pass through a narrow gauntlet. They would get off so. Much. Quicker. (I'm looking at you, everyone who tries to get on the Bay Ridge-bound R at Ninth Street in the evening.) But then of course you might not be able to be the first person who gets on the train.