So, yesterday—January 2nd—was a big day in the online dating world. Apparently, it is the day of the year when people are most likely to sign up for online dating services and to just straight up declare that they are looking for love. Buzzfeed compiled a handy chart showing the huge traffic spikes on dating sites like Match.com and OkCupid, and speculated that possible reasons for the increased traffic include New Year's resolutions to find love or holiday break ups or even the sad reality of having stayed with someone over the holidays just so as not to be pathetically alone when the clock struck midnight on New Year's Eve. That's terrible.
And, while it's fine for people to flock to these dating websites because there's nothing inherently wrong with stable relationships (well, maybe there is but we won't go into that here and now), still all you single people out there should know that it's just fine to be alone. There is no shame in solitude. But what's so great about being single, you ask? Well, lots of things! Here's a list of reasons why it's kind of great to be all alone, just in case that OkCupid thing doesn't work out as well as you want it to.
A good thing about being single is that you can catch up on all your reading. At least that is what currently single, though never truly alone, L Mag culture editor Henry Stewart told me. Stewart said, "The only thing I like about being single is having time to read, although I'm usually too sad to read." Which, ok, maybe doesn't sound too positive, but actually, reading when you're sad is kind of great. Lots of people are worse off than you in books. You'll ultimately feel better about yourself, I promise.
Obviously eating is a good thing to do at any time, but when you're single it's particularly fun. I mean, if you go out to eat and there are no free tables? You can sit at the bar. And if you're eating at home alone, you can eat whatever you want, no matter how gross it is, even if it's oatmeal with cheese in it. No one will judge! Except maybe your cat. I'm kind of assuming you have a cat, although, I know, I might be wrong. Cats are great though! Get a cat.
Going to Weddings
Now this might seem like a sort of depressing thing to do when you're single, but it's not and here's why. First, weddings are excellent places to drink for free and dance and who doesn't like drinking for free and dancing? Only monsters don't like those things. Monsters. Plus, everyone loves going to weddings, but you know what not everyone loves? Being married. And if you're single and going to a wedding, I can basically guarantee that you will have a drunken, good time and still leave without being legally attached to someone that you will almost definitely grow bored of within a few years.
Drugs and Karaoke
Not that I'm recommending that you do a lot of drugs, they're illegal and everything. But have you ever been in a relationship with someone and saw them really fucked up and then a little seed of hate was planted deep inside of you because when someone is high you see a real and true part of them that maybe they hide when they're sober but once it comes out you can't unsee it and maybe it's terrible. Also, people get really needy when they're high and you never want to be the needy one in a relationship. Or be in a relationship with a needy person. Bottom line, it's just smarter and more fun to get trashed when you're single. That's all I'm saying. Same goes for karaoke, actually. If you're at all inclined to sing karaoke, don't do it in front of a person who will later see you naked. It won't end well.
Smoking is a good thing to do if you're single. For one thing, people don't always like to date smokers, so you might not actually be able to do this if you're ever in a relationship. Also, not as many people care about you, so it's ok if you get sick. Another upside is that you look cool doing it, and as long as you're single, looking cool is of utmost importance. Extra coolness points if you roll your own.
Here's something fun that you can only do if you're single. Well, obviously, you can also do it if you're in a relationship, but, gross, don't do that. Don't be gross. And if you start your online dating now—when more people than ever sign up—then you'll have a large pool of people to choose from. And maybe next year, your resolution won't be "find love." Which, victory, you know? Anytime your resolution is not implying that you're afraid of dying and being eaten by your cats, you've won. You've won it all.
Follow Kristin Iversen on twitter @kmiversen