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Go Out Drinking
I mean, why watch a show about other people living their lives when you could actually be out living your OWN life? Go out and get trashed. Maybe drink White Russians and have anonymous miscarriage-inducing sex in a bathroom bar like Jessa did in that one episode during the first season of Girls. White Russians are delicious. And they look wholesome too. It's good to at least look wholesome when you're having sex that's so rough that you actually spontaneously expel a fetus from your body. Something to think about anyway.