Monday, January 14, 2013

Love Is Dead According to The New York Times

Posted By on Mon, Jan 14, 2013 at 10:00 AM

Page 2 of 2

Add some whiskey and youve got a great first date.
  • Add some whiskey and you've got a great first date.

Basically, it was a mixed bag, then? I mean, on the one hand, dancing around a tiny apartment to MGMT with some random "bros" sounds terrible, but, on the other hand, boxed macaroni and cheese and whiskey sounds amazing. Am I wrong in thinking that? Am I too a victim of "hookup culture"? Am I like Anna Goldfarb of Moorestown, NJ who is annoyed with men who want to know "what's going on tonight?" when clearly the answer, according to Ms. Goldfarb, is, "going to my friend’s house to drink cheap white wine and watch episodes of ‘Dance Moms’ on demand.”

Actually, no. No, I am not one of those women and neither are most of the other women I know who are (and this is the salient point) actually dating someone. The thing is, if you are actually dating someone, it is generally because they want to spend time with you. I don't just mean that they want to spend time with you because you are an interesting person to talk to and they are thinking about the future with you. I also mean that they want to rub themselves all over you and put their mouths on your body in places that you yourself can't reach. And if you're in a good relationship, all of these things come together in a beautiful way and having dinner at a nice restaurant can be a part of that because why not? Having someone buy you flowers can also be a part of that. Treating each other with respect and trying to make each other happy can all be a part of that totally healthy relationship. In fact, relationships and dating and love and romance can all be a wonderful thing. Well, for other people. They scare the shit out of me. I'm a whiskey-in-a-closed-room-for-24-hours kind of person, but that's not really the point right now. I mean, also I like jewelry, but, again, not the point right now.

The point is that, of course, young people still go on dates. But, also, sometimes people just want to have someone to have sex with. For all the women that the Times talked to who can't find anyone to date, well, far be it from me to give relationship advice, but, well, here's some advice. Don't confuse the guys with whom you're hooking up with for guys who are actually ready for a relationship. They're not the same thing. And if you only want to go on dates, then say no to the hookups. Although then you'll be missing out on casual sex. You win some, you lose some.

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About The Author

Kristin Iversen

Kristin Iversen

Kristin Iversen is the Managing Editor at Brooklyn Magazine and the L Magazine. She has been described as "a hipster buzzword made flesh." This seems pretty accurate.

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