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So, after talking about all those horrifying things, I wanted to end on a good note. So here it is. Crabs might be going extinct. By crabs, of course, I mean PUBIC LICE. Bloomberg reports that, "Pubic lice, the crab-shaped insects that have dwelled in human groins since the beginning of history, are disappearing. Doctors say bikini waxing may be the reason." So, that's exciting. One less thing to worry about anyway. As long as you keep things smooth, like a piece of salmon sashimi. Or an oyster. Ah, food that looks like a vagina is the only thing that keeps me going sometimes.
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