So, Mike is out today (I think he's having a baby or something) so I've been forced to cover the "stuff that for some reason matters mostly to music critics and 14-year-old girls" beat. Hence, thusly, I report the following: Lady Gaga
, aged 24, is currently celibate, and recommends that you (yes, you) stop all the wanton boning. From her lips to your ears (via MTV
I can't believe I'm saying this—don't have sex. I'm single right now and I've chosen to be single because I don't have the time to get to know anybody. So it's OK not to have sex, it's OK to get to know people. I'm celibate, celibacy's fine.
Please make your own "well that's easy enough for a hermaphrodite to say" joke now.