Today's story is a good one:
Cafe Grumpy in Greenpoint is offering a tiny $12 cup of fancy Ethiopian coffee (the beans of which have no doubt been laved by the tongues of well-read virgins), which, holy shit, $12! The outrage inducing quotation comes from Niles Krane stand-in Steve Holt, VP of the bean's distributors:
There are flavors you would expect in a really nice glass of wine—it's a cacophony of nuances. You detect flavors of apricot, pineapple, bergamot, kiwi and lime. The deeper tones are levels of chocolate, and the finish is super clean.
Did somebody say CACOPHONY OF NUANCES!!? Let's go straight to the Post commenters, who are loving this shit, in their baffling way.
"MalcolmMartin" starts strong with his anti-elitist bona fides, but is he a secret fancy pants? Really Malcolm, Starbucks? What is this "Sumatra" you speak of?
Me and America, we run on Dunkin'(and occasionally Starbucks). While I might be tempted to try a $12 cup of coffee... Nah, scratch that, I love coffee, but not that much. I did just brew myself a cup of "Sumatran" coffee from Starbucks. It is very good. But the whole bag cost around 12 bucks. One cup at that price, not for me.
"Rafalweb" fails to appreciate the evocation of one thing to describe another thing, vis a vis flavor accents. (Though his rush to dismiss "flavored coffee" also puts him on the edge of some pretty elitist leanings.)
If I want lime in my coffee, I'll squeeze one in. If I want kiwi in my mouth, I'll buy a kiwi for 33 cents and eat it. Till then, coffee flavored coffee, please.....for coffee prices.
"Jafu3457"'s class rage is about 15 years behind the times. Damn beatniks!
This will be a hit with the self-indulging UWS and West Village lefty snobs. They can sit around sipping and whining about how the government should do more to help the poor.
"Lou_BX67" just wants to talk about gas.
And these are the same morons who complain that gas is $3.50 a gallon.
At $12.00 for a 12 ounce coffee, that's the equivalent of $128.00 a gallon (128 ounces in a gallon).