Wednesday, June 30, 2010

A Brief Thought About Twilight

Posted by on Wed, Jun 30, 2010 at 4:57 PM

The author, in a recent photograph.
  • The author, in a recent photograph.
Let's say someone was 12 in 2005, the year of the first Twilight book's publication. That person would be 17 today, and, in 2012, will be old enough to vote for the first time in a presidential election. It seems inevitable, really, that supporters of Obama and—Romney? Let's say Romney, to be safe—will spend much of the run-up to the election in t-shirts reading "Team Barack" and "Team Mitt."

On a possibly related note, I've barely been out of college longer than I was in it and the Beloit Mindset List is already making me feel old.

Anyway.

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Will.i.am, Crime-Fighting Super Agent, Uses His iPad to Recover Stolen Property!

Posted by on Wed, Jun 30, 2010 at 4:31 PM

Will.i.am
No matter how you feel about his skills as an MC (weak) and a producer (dope), Black Eyed Peas posterboy and beatsmith Will.i.am is a tech-savvy fellow. How much so? Well, last week poor lil' Will had his Bentley broken into in normally crime-free Hollywood Hills, and the thieves made off with over $10,000 worth of "stuff." So what did Will.i.am do, aside from hopefully learning not to leave stuff amounting to ten grand on his back seat while he's out riding his robot space elephant?

He went all Ethan Hunt on them thieves, used the tracking device in the brand new iPad they stole to figure out where the loot was being kept, called the cops, and has already gotten nearly all his goods back. LAPD is reportedly on the thief's heels, expecting to make an arrest soon, but, spoiler alert, it was totally fellow Pea apl.de.ap. (HipHopWired, TMZ)

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Inflict an Oil Spill on Any Website You Want with Instant Oil Spill

Posted by on Wed, Jun 30, 2010 at 4:02 PM

Instant Oil Spill THe L Magazine homepage
  • Oh no, not our pristine website! Damn you BP!

A new, better than the last, web app has the BP oil leak in the Gulf of Mexico spilling all over any website you please. Just go to Instant Oil Spill enter whatever URL you (dis)like—ours for instance—and watch the devastation unfold before your very eyes. (Oil-coated fish, turtles and birds not included.) (NOTCOT)

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Watch a Short Animation of Alfred Hitchcock Explaining How a McGuffin Works

Posted by on Wed, Jun 30, 2010 at 3:34 PM

The interview audio is old news (very old news that a nerdier film nerd may be able to cite and date for us in the comments... is it from the Truffaut interview?), but Isaac Niemand's clever visuals do a great deal to help illustrate the simple yet often elusive concept of the McGuffin. My favorite film class example was always the Maltese Falcon in The Maltese Falcon, but obviously Hitch's work is full of 'em. (DesignYouTrust)

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Play the 8-Bit Video Game Version of Twilight: Eclipse

Posted by on Wed, Jun 30, 2010 at 3:01 PM

In this hilarious old school video game-style version of the latest film in the Twilight saga by The Station, you control Bella, and have to choose between Jake and Edward. However, be warned: if you try to set her up with Jake, as would be best for her, or do anything really that doesn't follow the plot of the film, Victoria invariably shows up and kills you with a lightning bolt attack. Good luck, young Twihards. (TheDailyWhat)

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How to Make Money Off Free Magazines

Posted by on Wed, Jun 30, 2010 at 2:32 PM

Yes Darling But Is It Advertorial?
  • Yes Darling But Is It Advertorial?
"How to Make Money Off Free Magazines: Vodka, Girls, Vegas, Maybachs. Plus, Lenny Dykstra!" is the headline of a recent post at the Observer which we at The L are reading with great interest. The Observer's Zeke Turner summarizes the tale of magazines like Trader Monthly, Dealmaker, Private Air, Corporate Leader and Cigar Report, which in last decade's better times would provide traders, dealmakers and corporate leaders with about a half a million complimentary copies, and subsidize their existence by staging sponsored events in which traders, dealmakers and corporate leaders would soak up free vodka and marketing for the rich-people products eager to reach them.

In possibly related news, the venerable Chicago Reader is currently reporting on the firing of its longtime editor.

Continue reading »

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Win Tickets to the New Museum's Private Party for Brion Gysin's Dream Machine

Posted by on Wed, Jun 30, 2010 at 2:02 PM

Last week our friends at the New Museum were giving away a deluxe membership worth 400 smackers (which, congrats to Kris Keyser of Chatham, NJ) and this week the rules are basically the same, but the prize is different. Just send an email with your name and address and the subject "PARTY" to membership@newmuseum.org and you'll be entered to win two tickets to the NuMu's upcoming private party for the opening of Brion Gysin: Dream Machine on the evening of July 13. What's this Dream Machine, you ask? I'll let the late Mr. Gysin explain:

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Profiles in Cowardice: Marty Golden

Posted by on Wed, Jun 30, 2010 at 1:37 PM

golden.jpg

Marty Golden has become gun-toting criminals' newest hero!

Agree with the state senator from Bay Ridge or not (and we certainly do not), nobody's happy about his cowardly abstention from a hard vote. Criticism has been mounting—including handed-out fliers like the one above—from right and left since Golden missed a vote two weeks ago on "microstamping" that would have "require[d] semiautomatic handguns made and sold in New York to have unique identifying information on spent shells," Bay Ridge Interpol explains.

Golden stepped out of the chamber to take a phone call, standing in the hallway while he was called upon to vote. The bill failed, and now criminals can go back to shooting Golden's old cop-colleagues with anonymity!

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Contraband Cinema: What Makes a Political Film?

Posted by on Wed, Jun 30, 2010 at 1:05 PM

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Today through July 8th, BAMcinematek is hosting “Contraband Cinema,” one of the most original and unique offerings of political cinema in some time. The eclectic and controversial lineup eschews many of the more obvious choices; instead, it brings together rare classics like Jean Rouch’s 1955 short Les Maitres Fous (The Mad Masters, one of the earliest and most famous ethnographic films, a study of West African Hauka that explores the dynamic between ritual and colonialism), Pier Paolo Pasolini’s Salò, or the 120 Days of Sodom (1975) (in which the Marquis de Sade’s legendary, controversial text is updated into a sadomasochistic tale of Fascism during World War II), and Emile de Antonio and Mary Lampson’s Weather Underground doc Underground (1976); unheard-of rarities like The Animals Film (1981), about man’s inhumanity towards animals; mind-boggling conversation starters like Black Panthers (In Israel) Speak (2002); and even Sylvester Stallone’s late-Cold War snowy classic Rocky IV (1985).

The range, depth, and diversity of the program—to say nothing of its intelligence and excellence—can be attributed to its collectivist mentality (itself a political statement on the art and bureaucracy of curating). Bringing together several organizations and individuals, the series is being presented by Red Channels and the Brecht Forum, and was collectively curated by Jake Perlin, Matt Peterson, Kazembe Balagun, Valeria Mogilevich, Rebecca Cleman, and James Spooner. Together, they pose the question, “What makes a political film?” To help answer this question, and to discuss the process of collaborative curating as well as some of the gems from the program, I recently sat down with two of the series’ presenters: Matt Peterson from Red Channels and Kazembe Balagun from The Brecht Forum.

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The Definitive List of Asshole Subway Behavior

Posted by on Wed, Jun 30, 2010 at 12:39 PM

design blagh
If you ride the subway every day, you will encounter rude and thoughtless assholes who are either oblvious to the world around them, or so socially dysfunctional that they just don't care about how their behavior affects others. This is one of the frustrating things about living in a city, and most of the time you just have to kind of put your head down and turn the volume up (or you'll go totally crazy with rage).

In what seems like an attempt to forestall said paralyzing rage, the good people at DesignBlahg have distilled the object essence of subway douchery into eight must-have items for eight kinds of subway douchebags. Highlights include "A giant fucking backpack," a "BOB Revolution Duallie Stroller," and, of course, a "Gigantic bucket of chicken from KFC." We salute you, DesignBlahg.

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Eclipse, And The Twilight of Sexual Progress

Posted by and on Wed, Jun 30, 2010 at 12:01 PM

Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart in The Twilight Saga: Eclipse
Hey, it’s Blockbluster, our seasonal feature in which Benjamin Sutton and Henry Stewart leave their modernist vampire house in rural Washington to find out during which sort of movies regular people all over the country are not making out. This week, David Slade’s The Twilight Saga: Eclipse leaves them thinking dark thoughts.

HENRY:
Ben, if I hadn’t had to check my phone at the door, I’d have been texting you all through Eclipse. Mostly, “OMG!” Because, wow, there were a lot of OMG! moments in there, no? If I had to guess, I’d say Stephanie Meyer wasn’t a day over 14 when she wrote this installment in her quite profitable tetrology (soon to be a cinematic pentology). And even that’s a little generous. This movie doesn’t just feel like it’s for tweens, Ben—it feels like it’s by tweens!

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Bay Ridge Facebook Group To Call Out Illegals-Hiring Businesses

Posted by on Wed, Jun 30, 2010 at 11:32 AM

Duh sezzames stingk!
  • Duh sezzames stingk!
A new Facebook group's name doesn't quite explain itself; at first, I thought "Bay Ridge Business's that employ Undocumented & Illegal Immigrants" might be a bulletin board undocumented workers could use to find out who's hiring. Alas, its mission statement is "to expose the business's in Bay ridge who hire and employ Undocumented & Illegal Immigrants."

Furthermore, "This group allows U.S. citizens"—but not illegal immigrants!!—"to see the business's who employ Undocumented & Illegal Immigrants in Bay Ridge and allows them to decide if they would like to spend they're money at these establishments with the knowledge that these business's are breaking American Tax & Labor laws and being overall unpatriotic."

That's not as bad as it might sound.

Continue reading »

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Summerscreen: Seven Days from Now

Posted by on Wed, Jun 30, 2010 at 10:55 AM

1277318800-summerscreen.jpg

This is just a friendly reminder that Summerscreen, the L's and Williamsburg's annual outdoor film series, returns to McCarren across from Turkey's Nest (home of enormous frozen margaritas to go!) in exactly a week's time, next Wednesday, July 7th, for all your outdoor summer movie needs. As well as all your outdoor after-work-before-dark live music needs, and all your local food and drink needs—we'll have beer from Sixpoint, along with food from Pizza Moto, Asia Dogs, People's Pops, San Loco, and more from the Brooklyn Flea.

So please do keep up with Summerscreen updates on Facebook, and join us next Wednesday for John Cusack's proto-emo boomboxa love, and subsequently for a movie David Bowie definitely has no memory of; a movie pretty much everybody from middle school remembers every second of; Johnny Depp unto death; giant bugs from the bastard son of Bruckheimer and Brecht; and extreme sports with the late Patrick Swayze and the great Kathryn Bigelow.

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Sweet Beautiful Relief...

Posted by on Wed, Jun 30, 2010 at 10:28 AM

The offices of The L Magazine, on a nice day.
  • The offices of The L Magazine, on a nice day.
Ok, I know I've made fun of popular metro bloggers before for talking about the weather, but after the last five god-awful days hunched over a sweat-stained laptop in the dark cave of my apartment, to come into the office today on a truly glorious summer day, the clouds high, white and scudding, the air fresh and moving... well... well... I just wanted to talk about the weather. (I'll be inside for the rest of the day.)

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Tuesday, June 29, 2010

See People Making That Face on New Tumblr Pictures of Peple Making This Face

Posted by on Tue, Jun 29, 2010 at 4:31 PM

People Making This Face

You sort of pull your eye sockets downwards, tug your mouth wide and, if you're sufficiently dexterous, push your nose up, piggy-like, and voila, you're just like the folks on Pictures of People Making This Face, an odd and frankly rather impolite new single-serving Tumblr blog. Although I suppose anyone's liable to be a little short-tempered and prone to face-making in this type of weather. (TheDailyWhat)

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You May Remember Troy McLure from One of his 100+ Credits in this Simpsons Charticle

Posted by on Tue, Jun 29, 2010 at 3:57 PM

Troy McLure Charticle

Where do you remember Troy McLure from? Was it from "The Unbearable Moistness of Sweating"? What about "Cut It Out: The Wacky Adventures of Jack the Ripper"? Could it be from "Driving Mr. T"? Or did you see him in "Trucks"? Whatever it was, it's somewhere in a massive new charticle some bored fan made of every single "Hi, I'm Troy McLure, you may remember me from..." moment on The Simpsons. Click here for the full version. (RIP Phil Hartman) (NextRound)

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Strangely None Of My Co-Workers Seems to Have Posted This Video of Janelle Monae Covering "Let's Go Crazy" at the BET Awards Yet

Posted by on Tue, Jun 29, 2010 at 3:28 PM

This is still relatively new and noteworthy, right? She wears her hair really high and dances side-to-side in saddle shoes as per usual; Prince, in the audience, smiles faintly and nods, once, in approval. It's fun:

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La Captive: Proust for the People

Posted by on Tue, Jun 29, 2010 at 2:59 PM

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Tonight, the French Institute Alliance Francaise concludes their tribute to the actress Sylvie Testud with a screening of Chantal Akerman's free adaptation of The Captive, the fifth volume of Remembrance of Things Past. In the current print edition of the L, Nicolas Rapold had this to say.

Lost in those first heady postmillennial days was this superb, transfixing take on Proustean drift, temporal, sensual, sexual. It screens tonight as part of FIAF’s series for Sylvie Testud, whose seemingly shifting features and subliminal currents of emotion are on display. Gorgeously streamlined and fluid compared to Raoul Ruiz’s magic-lantern show, Time Regained, one year earlier and perhaps too fresh in critics' minds, it’s shot by Manoel de Oliveira’s DP Sabine Lancelin. Akerman herself has expressed regret that the film did not receive American distribution, which makes little sense for one of the decade’s top films, so let’s make it up to her.

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Surreal Short Film "The Bench" Shows How Most of Us Feel Right Now

Posted by on Tue, Jun 29, 2010 at 2:26 PM

Are you unbearably warm, uncomfortably sweaty, incapable of moving from where you're sitting at this very moment, and seeing strange things like a cowboy dog sporting a rainbow-colored sweater and shooting it out with a laser-eyed furball? Then you're kind of like the sleepy protagonist in Kitty Crowther and Bruno SalAmone's "The Bench (Le banc)," the perfect little hand-drawn short for a sweltering day such as this one. (NOTCOT)

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Not In My Palace! Louvre Curator Slams Upcoming Murakami Show at Versailles

Posted by on Tue, Jun 29, 2010 at 1:49 PM

Takashi Murakami
Way back in the dead of winter, I wrote that Takashi Murakami had been picked to be the next contemporary artist to have his own show in the gilded halls of Versailles, following in the chrome puppy pawsteps of Jeff Koons's inaugural 2008 show there. Now, with the September 12 opening date fast approaching, a curator from another Parisian cultural institution, perhaps you've heard of it, the Louvre, is calling for the J-pop surrealist's head. Specifically, Louvre contemporary art curator Marie-Laure Bernadac told The Art Newspaper's French sister publication: "Koons was a good choice, but I really don't see what Versailles has in common with the figurative Japanese world of Murakami."

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