Tuesday, August 23, 2011

What Radio-Friendly Word Rhymes With "Blowjob"?

Posted By on Tue, Aug 23, 2011 at 3:35 PM

See? Hes stumped.
  • See? He's stumped.
It's officially Malkmus Week here in New York, what with the Pavement and Jicks icon performing two special solo acoustic sessions at Academy and Other Music on Thursday, and there's no better way to kick it off than with some lyric crowdsourcing.

See, Stephen Malkmus needs your help. Specifically, Stephen Malkmus needs your help coming up with a kid and radio-friendly substitute for the word "blowjob" in the song "Senator" (from the Jicks' latest, lauded album Mirror Traffic), which he will perform live from Hollywood's Amoeba Music at 9 p.m (EST). Malkmus will announce the winner of the BJ challenge before his set.

This gives us a little more than five hours to brainstorm as many alternatives as possible. Difficult, as minds are probably trained to Freudian slip in the opposite direction. But who's up for handling the stiffer challenge? Hey, maybe all the Senator wants is immigration reform, so don't be afraid to go deep. It's time we swallowed the hard political topics, eh?

Okay, these puns are even making me gag. But just one more: Is that a rhyming dictionary in your pocket, or are you just happy to see Stephen Malkmus?

Yuk yuk yuk. Now, rub those hands together, cover your teeth and fill in the blank. "All the Senator wants is a _________." You can submit your answer on the website here and find out who won tonight when the performance streams live here. Video with lyrics to "Senator" after the jump.

[via Domino Records]

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