Monday, August 13, 2012

For Make-Believe: Noel's Internal Dialogue While Watching Liam Play ‘Wonderwall’ During Last Night’s Olympics Closing Ceremonies

Posted By on Mon, Aug 13, 2012 at 1:03 PM

I should’ve told him he had to sing “Roll With It," not "Wonderwall." I could’ve done that because I wrote all the songs. He said he would vomit if Oasis ever reunited? I'm going to vomit all over this ridiculously expensive telly right now. He sounds piss poor, all nasally like Thom Yorke. Sad and ugly. It’s a known fact that I wrote this. All the people know this was a song that I wrote even though I got quite good at playing lead guitar and hanging out in the back not hogging the spotlight because I didn't need the spotlight. Christ, he looks old. This song is about my ex-girlfriend, an imaginary friend, how much I wanted my brother to disappear into the ether. I know because I wrote this song. Joke’s on you, Liam! I rather be hearing Mumford & fucking Sons right now. Is that Kate Moss over there? Fuck, get that girl a sandwich.

[returns to sculpting his eyebrows in the mirror]

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