Friday, May 17, 2013

The "Smallest Penis In Brooklyn" Pageant Is Now A Thing

Posted By on Fri, May 17, 2013 at 2:04 PM

raymond_george-costanza-shrinkage.jpg

Sure, why not. Well, "why" is also a pretty valid question, but regardless, this is happening. And happening in a surprisingly, uh, thorough fashion, thanks to Kings County Bar in Bushwick.

According to Gothamist, this mess (which is a strictly 21 and over event) will have some pretty specific rules. Namely, that photo and video submissions aren't allowed (though what are they going to do, throw away the greasy unmarked envelope of DVDs you sent in?), and that "while nudity is not required, contestants should expect to wear wet underwear (which will be provided)."

Winners will receive a donation to a charity of their choosing and can also to just take the cash home themselves, so maybe this will turn out to be good for someone, somewhere. At the very least, we're guessing it will be a good way for the bar to sell lots and lots of alcohol. Anyway, this is all happening July 20th, which leaves you ample time to what, I don't know. Train? Ugh.

Follow Virginia K. Smith on Twitter @vksmith.

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