Sex

Saturday, June 15, 2013

Northside Festival: Highlights from The Weekend

Posted By on Sat, Jun 15, 2013 at 11:41 AM

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The weekend is now upon us, and we are confident that even these past two wonderful days are going to pale in comparison to what you will experience for the next two. The rain is behind us, we're told, and their are good vibes as far as the eye can see. Let's get started.

Saturday
You could do much, much worse than to pack a blanket and grab some friends and commit to spending the whole day at McCarren. There will be food and beer and lots of attractive people and the aforementioned good vibes. And then there will be music, courtesy of The Walkmen in their only New York show of 2013, as well as the always awesome and newly fawned over Phosphorescent, as well as Friend Roulette and Abadabad. Tickets are sold out, but entry is guaranteed with a badge. Click here to buy a badge.

Another show you could hit up on the early side is going down over at Spike Hill starting at 2pm and featuring a handful of the bands—Caged Animals, The Denzels, Juniper Rising and Coastgaard—from this year's installment of our "8 Bands You Need to Hear" issue. It's one we always feel a strong attachment to, of course, and thus... more good vibes.

At Music Hall on Saturday night, you'll have a chance to see the wonderful, underrated and recently reunited alt-country legends Son Volt, featuring Jay Farrar. Click here to buy individual tickets, or click here to buy a badge. You've also got Merchandise and Milk Music at 285 Kent (click here for individual tickets), and another chance to see Black Flag at Warsaw (click here for individual tickets). And then consider hitting up Jonathan Toubin's Soul Clap & Dance-Off at Brooklyn Bowl. (NB: Our own Virginia K. Smith is judging the dance-off, but we've never seen her dance.) Click here to buy individual tickets, or click here to buy a badge.

Sunday
Once again, it's gonna be hard to argue with anyone who tells you they just want to hang out at McCarren all day, waiting around to see Solange take the stage. We are quite fond of her, you know, and we think lots of other really famous people are too, so… fingers crossed, you guys, but just be cool, ok? Tickets are sold out, but Music and Premium badge-holders are guaranteed entry. Click here to get yours.

After Solange, you could race over to Europa to see the mighty Lambchop performing a full set of their dark and deeply weird lounge-tinged country music, much of which will presumably come from their outstanding 2012 album, Mr. M. Click here to buy individual tickets, or click here to buy a badge.

There's a hell of a bill scheduled at Glasslands tonight too, with sets by visiting Americana-loving L.A. band Papa and the similarly minded Brooklyn band Grand Rapids bookending a performance by synth-pop leaning Future of What.

Really, though, you could also dedicate your Sunday night to just wandering around and checking out some bands you've never heard of before, lest we forget why we're here in the first place—to discover the bands that next year and in years down the road will be playing to much bigger audiences.

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Monday, June 10, 2013

Sex, Love, and Brooklyn: Missed Connections on the F Train

Posted By on Mon, Jun 10, 2013 at 9:45 AM

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  • Sophie Blackall

It's a rite of passage for New Yorkers. Everyone I know (especially all my gay male friends) has had at least one missed connection. Mine happened on the F train two summers ago. It was a summer that I looked hot. I was at my thinnest and making a ton of money from collecting unemployment and working an under-the-table bartending job. I spent all my dough on gingham hot pants and matching crop tops. I had a tan and I felt sexy. Also, I decided I really loved Jennifer Egan's writing and I bought every book she ever wrote from BookCourt in Cobble Hill. I was working my through each of them in chronological order and was in the middle of her oeuvre with the novel, Look At Me.

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Monday, June 3, 2013

Sex, Love, and Brooklyn: Summertime Sex

Posted By on Mon, Jun 3, 2013 at 9:30 AM

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  • Ryan McGinley

Summertime. Sticky. Sweat behind my knees. Girls in white dresses popping up like daffodils in Fort Greene Park. Beers on stoops and mint juleps in backyard gardens. Cigarettes between my fingers. Watermelon salad and ice cream cones. Ice cubes sliding down my bare stomach melting from the heat inside your mouth. Cold showers. After I'm shivering beneath your fingers, then sweating again back in the bedroom underneath your body.

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Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Sex, Love, and Brooklyn: Wedding Sex

Posted By on Tue, May 28, 2013 at 9:30 AM

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What time is it? Wedding time! That's right, starting in May, picking up steam in June, and going full force through the summer, there will be an insurmountable number of weddings to attend. Or so I've been told. I've only been to two weddings, but people are always complaining to me about the how many weddings they have to go to. They're all like, “I will just barf if I have to face another chicken dance with the groom's 3rd cousin.” I don't know, but it sounds great to me. No one I know is getting married this spring. They're too bohemian I guess, or too alone.

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Monday, May 20, 2013

Sex, Love, and Brooklyn: Putting On My Big Girl Pants

Posted By on Mon, May 20, 2013 at 9:45 AM

Dont ever lie about how you like your eggs. Youll be haunted by this forever.
  • Don't ever lie about how you like your eggs. You'll be haunted by this forever.

Let me tell you a story. Once upon a time, a beautiful, smart, and funny young woman went on a blind date with an attractive, intelligent gent who also happened to be semi-humorless. On her side, there were no sparks. However, due to a certain upbringing, she was by nature (or nurture?) a pleaser. Hence, she laughed at his jokes, complimented his bow tie, and let him place his hand on the small of her back. Ok, she did more than just that; they made out passionately because she felt too polite to say no after he bought her all those fancy cocktails. He walked away from the date thinking that not only would there be a second one, but also that, on the next go-around, there might even be more action than just teenage-style necking.

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Monday, May 13, 2013

Sex, Love, and Brooklyn: Cum On My Tits and Other Sex Habits of the Highly Effective Man

Posted By on Mon, May 13, 2013 at 9:30 AM

Charm, personified.
  • Charm, personified.

The other night I was having coffee with an older writer. He is known for his Don Draper charm, his good looks, and the bachelorhood requisite to this kind of allure. He is also notorious for having been called a “toxic cad” in print by a female writer. He is the kind of man who then put the quote on his website. I'd like to think we are kindred spirits. So when I told him a story about a recent one night stand, I was shocked to hear him say, “Lacy, a friend of mine recently started therapy, and his therapist told him not to have sex with anyone until 15 dates in. I think maybe you should do the same.”

Hold up.

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Friday, May 10, 2013

5 Things To Do This Weekend <i>Besides</i> See <i>The Great Gatsby</i>

Posted By on Fri, May 10, 2013 at 2:24 PM

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Sure, there's something to be said for the benefit of the doubt, and maybe, just maybe, The Great Gatsby isn't going to suck. But you know what is definitely, without question going to suck? A lot? Opening weekend crowds.

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Friday, May 3, 2013

Sex, Love, and Brooklyn: Some Thoughts on Threesomes

Posted By on Fri, May 3, 2013 at 10:00 AM

This movie is HIGHLY underrated.
  • This movie is HIGHLY underrated.

My best friend Claire moved to London three years ago. She was lonely and lost in a new city that was entirely unwelcoming. That all changed when she met Adam. They spent two tumultuous years together—years in which her identity and self-esteem took a real hit. After the break-up, I flew to London to look after her, and she begged me to go out to dinner with both her and him. She was so sad and such a mess that I felt I had be more of a supportive figure than an authoritative one, and I acquiesced. But I was totally ready to hate him. You can probably see where this story is going.

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Thursday, May 2, 2013

You're Invited to the Chamber Music Society's Production of <i>Britten at 100</i>

Posted By on Thu, May 2, 2013 at 1:43 PM

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You're invited to Britten at 100, a performance by the Chamber Music Society on Friday, May 10 at 7:30 at Alice Tully Hall at Lincoln Center. Enjoy a tribute to one of the greatest English composers of the 20th century.

L Mag readers can take advantage of an exclusive discounted ticket price; see Britten at 100 for just $25. To redeem your discounted tickets, click here and enter the code "100CMSL" at checkout.

After the performance, enjoy a private party and liquor tasting in the intimate Rose Studio, a short walk down the block from Alice Tully Hall. Refreshments will be provided by Warwick Vineyards and Brooklyn Brewery.

For more information on Britten at 100, click here.

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Photos: At the First Literary Upstart Semi-Final Reading

Posted By on Thu, May 2, 2013 at 12:14 PM

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With the arrival of spring also comes Literary Upstart, our annual short fiction competition in which the borough's best unknown writers go toe-to-toe to compete for cash, a 10-week course from Gotham Writers Workshop and a giant novelty check worth $250. Our first semi-final reading happened back in the last week of April at the gorgeously cavernous powerHouse Books in DUMBO (go there immediately and buy some books). Words were read, beers were shared, and trivia contestants were stumped at the merciless hand of quiz master and host Maris Kreizman (of Slaughterhouse 90210 fame). Thanks to our readers Chandra Steele, Lindsay Hood, Eric Nelson, and our winner, Sarah Crosby. You'll see her again at our grand finale reading on Thursday, June 4. Missed the first semi-final reading? You'll find photos of the night's happenings after the jump. And, a big thank you to our sponsors at Gotham Writers Workshop, Brooklyn Brewery, Harper Perennial, Shillington School, and the powerHouse Arena.

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Friday, April 26, 2013

Sex, Love, and Brooklyn: How to Put a Condom On with Your Mouth

Posted By on Fri, Apr 26, 2013 at 10:00 AM

Condoms. Awful, am I right? There is nothing worse than getting your groove on with someone—really dry-humping the fuck out of them—and then pulling out a condom, only to watch them lose their erection. Something about that tiny foil square makes people own up to the fact they are going to have sex, and all of a sudden the weight of what that really means (i.e. holy fuck I don't even know your name and I have a girlfriend) comes barreling down on their dicks, and there goes the wind in that sail. I can honestly say this is one moment where I am glad I am not a man.

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Friday, April 19, 2013

Sex, Love, and Brooklyn: Birthday Blues and The Feminine Mystique

Posted By on Fri, Apr 19, 2013 at 10:00 AM

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  • c/o mentalfloss.com

Today I turn 29. When I was 17, I flew to London to audition for acting schools. While there, I sent a letter to my best friend, Mariah. More than 10 years later she found this letter and felt compelled to read it to me. This is because she is a sadist. And I am sharing it with you because I am a masochist.

Dearest Mariah,

I am sitting in a cramped hotel room, 3-stars my ass, dragging on a clove Kent. I'm marveling at just how alike we are. There is so much to tell you. I have fallen in love with London—the smell, the taste, the way everyone walks so differently, like they dance to their own drumbeat. There are so many climates of thoughts and opinions converging all together—you can feel the city thriving. It is a living, breathing thing, feasting on creation and ideas. Today I had RADA, tomorrow I have Central School of Speech and Drama. RADA went really well, I hope to God Central does too.

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Monday, April 15, 2013

6 Things To Do With A Condom (Besides Put It Up Your Nose)

Posted By on Mon, Apr 15, 2013 at 2:06 PM

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Oh, young people. Every time you think they've reached a collective low point, something like "the Condom Challenge" happens, reminding us anew that there is truly no bottom to the depths to which teenagers can plummet on the internet.

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Friday, April 12, 2013

Sex, Love, and Brooklyn: Lacy's Guide to Brooklyn's Underground Sex Parties (Part 3)

Posted By on Fri, Apr 12, 2013 at 10:00 AM

Before the party, in the infamous muumuu.

I do not like subcultures. Burning Man attendees, steam punks, Victorian goths, Harajuku girls, and even trapeze artists give me the serious heebie-jeebies. Maybe I just got too burned-out (no pun intended) on nutritional yeast and hula hoops from college, but I hate when grownups roll around half-naked and covered in any type of face paint or glitter. When my ex-boyfriend told me he used to go to raves in a Yorkshire field wearing JNCOs and a blue wig, I lost a little respect for him. And I am totally allowed to say this because some of my best friends are radical fairies! But every time they try to tell me about their cool festival in Tennessee, I just plug my ears with my fingers and start to scream: “La La La. I can't hear you.”

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Monday, April 8, 2013

Sex, Love, and Brooklyn: Lacy's Guide to Brooklyn's Underground Sex Parties (Part 2)

Posted By on Mon, Apr 8, 2013 at 9:45 AM

Williamsburg sex parties are the best time to wear American Apparel.
  • c/o American Apparel
  • Williamsburg sex parties are the best time to wear American Apparel.

What exactly was I doing spending an absurd amount of money on American Apparel lingerie? While it's true that I’ve always wanted a neon pink garter belt, the real reason I was outfitting myself in brightly colored mesh was that I was heading to Chemistry, my newest adventure on the Brooklyn Play party scene. And what else besides American Apparel can you wear to a hipster sex party in Williamsburg?

In order to get in the door at Chemistry you have to get approved or you won't get in. This requires filling out an application and sending in a picture. It is very expensive: $120 for single ladies, $130 for hetero couples, and $250 for single men—and there is also a warning that single men rarely get approved. Chemistry sends a list of rules beforehand—and, my god, once again so many rules! However, when going over this particular list of rules, I realized that it was pretty good everyday advice, as much as it was also sex party appropriate behavior.

Here are some of my favorite rules:

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Monday, April 1, 2013

Sex, Love, and Brooklyn: Lacy's Guide to Brooklyn's Underground Sex Parties (Part 1)

Posted By on Mon, Apr 1, 2013 at 11:45 AM

This is not what a sex party in Park Slope looks like. Or is it? (Its not.)
  • This is not what a sex party in Park Slope looks like. Or is it? (It's not.)

A few years ago, I met a very powerful and rich man at the dog park while I was puppy sitting my best friend's puggle. We went on a few dates and I thought it might lead to something more serious. What it led to was an email asking if I would be his date to a party. I thought it was going to be some amazing affair—full of celebrities and other influential people—that would help me become a star. I wrote back asking what I should wear: “Is the party themed?” He responded, “No theme, but it’s 100% a sex party. Are you down?” My heart sank. I politely declined, but he called me later in the day to explain that only someone as sex positive as me could be his date.

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Friday, March 29, 2013

The Do's and Don'ts Of Dating With Tinder

Posted By on Fri, Mar 29, 2013 at 11:32 AM

A/S/L?
  • "A/S/L?"

Recently, we brought you a bunch of helpful, vehement advice about making your OKCupid profile the best it can be. Well, as of now, OKCupid is dead. Sorry! We're living in the future, and that future is all about Tinder.

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Thursday, March 21, 2013

Sex, Love and Brooklyn: Ass-Play and Other Things

Posted By on Thu, Mar 21, 2013 at 1:28 PM

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The other night I met someone at a birthday party and seduced him. He was dead sexy: a blonde wearing cowboy boots. (Sidenote: I’m beginning to realize through this column I have a thing for blondes.)  When we got home, the sex was not hot—lukewarm at best. Whatever position we tried, he kept falling out of me. When this happens once, you think, “Whatever, it’s just bodies being weird and not fitting together exactly right.  Nobody’s perfect.” When it happens over and over, you both start to feel insecure. I kept thinking my vagina had finally stretched out, even though I believe this is a horrible myth designed to make women feel even worse about ourselves. He started to get anxious and kept saying he was sorry.  “Sorry," of course, is the least sexy word. It is very hard to come back after "sorry."

While I was on top, I felt him get just a little bit softer, and I couldn’t take it anymore. I got off him. Not one to go without a fight though, I went downtown. He started to make some noise, and I thought, “We’re getting somewhere.” I noticed he really loved it when I licked his balls, and inched closer to his taint. I slipped a finger into his butt and his body began to writhe. That’s when I made the executive decision to eat out his asshole. Bam. Boom. Fireworks.

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Monday, March 18, 2013

If Your Friends Write Your OKCupid Profile, You Will Die Alone

Posted By on Mon, Mar 18, 2013 at 4:21 PM

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  • Cupid With Friends

Well, technically, your "CupidWithFriends" profile, which is conveniently designed to look almost identical to that other, more famous Cupid-oriented dating site, right down to the font. But weird, subtle copyright infringement isn't the point here. The point, actually, is that your friends are likely monsters. Monsters who never, ever want you to find love.

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Monday, March 11, 2013

The STD Screening App You've Been Praying For Is Now a Reality

Posted By on Mon, Mar 11, 2013 at 1:52 PM

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  • STD Triage

It even has a fancy, official sounding term to go with it: "tele-dermatology." Originally, Swedish company iDoc24 had designed a service that allowed people to send in pictures of their skin conditions to be checked out and assessed by medical professionals, according to the company's founder Alexander Börve. Naturally, at least 30 percent of inquires turned out to be "of the genital area."

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