Robert Pattinson Caused 9/11

Full of potential, Remember Me will instead be remembered as an offensive disaster.

By Benjamin Sutton

American Idol Recap: Oh, Hey America, Fuck You, You Are So Stupid

Way to go, everyone else. You continue to ruin everything.

By Mike Conklin

The Single Best Paragraph in the Entire David Foster Wallace Archive

Other than the Viking poem, I mean.

By Mark Asch

Home Foreclosure: As Sleazy and Shady As You Think

In which I tell you a personal story about parrots found and truly evil mortgage companies.

By Jonny Diamond

Going On Today...

in Talks & Readings

in Music

in Theater

Off the Hook: Why Local Seafood is Sustainable

A part of the Greenmarket's Educated Eater Series, this talk will explore local fishing techniques and attempt to explain how to become informed about where your fish are being fished, and what you are actually eating in and around New York. $10

92Y Tribeca, 200 Hudson St, between Desbrosses and Vestry Sts, Tribeca

Music

Pop Scene:<br> Auto-Tune at its Best... and Worst

Pop Scene:
Auto-Tune at its Best... and Worst

We look at songs by Orianthi, T-Pain and Timbaland, only one of which is even remotely listenable.

By Mike Conklin and Benjamin Sutton

Goth Goes Mainstream, Sorta

Dear God, I Hate Myself is not only Xiu Xiu's band's best-named record to date, it's also their most approachable.

By Jeff Klingman

The Shout Out Louds Grow Up

The Swedish band experiments with more interesting textures and varied tempos, but they're still a pop band, and proud of it.

By Lauren Beck

Still Quasi After All These Years

Over fifteen years into their career, the Portland mainstays release American Gong, containing some of the best work they've ever done.

By Jeff Klingman

Feb 17, 2010

Film

All About the Mother

Bong Joon-ho's quirky neo-noir Mother tracks an unlikely detective's ruthless investigation.

By Benjamin Sutton

Robert Pattinson Caused 9/11

Full of potential, Remember Me will instead be remembered as an offensive disaster.

By Benjamin Sutton

This Movie Will Self-Destruct In 80 Minutes

Local indie The Exploding Girl is its own worst enemy.

By Andrew Schenker

On a Scale of 1 to 10...

Hateful "romantic" "comedy" She's Out of My League is really asking for it.

By Nick McCarthy

Food & Drink

Philippine Dream

Ditmas Park's Purple Yam will almost definitely knock your socks off.

By Kara Zuaro

Feb 17, 2010

Roebling Inn: The Song Remains the Same (Sort of)

You take one bar out, you put another bar in... The Roebling Inn is just ok, for now.

By Kara Zuaro

Feb 3, 2010

A Bistro Named Sue

Sue Perette's new French on Smith Street is perfectly unfussy.

By Kara Zuaro

Jan 20, 2010

Cheap Eats in Fancy Digs

Now you can tell people you ate somewhere posh without actually spending lots of money.

Jan 20, 2010

Columns

Sex With the Natural Redhead

Sleep Sex, Amateur Hookers and Physics

By Audrey Ference

In which many exciting facts about sex and the Animal Kingdom are revealed.

Fashionville

Snow Nor Tragedy Stops Fashion Week

By Laurel Pinson

A blizzard. The awful death of Alexander McQueen. Fashion Week stops for nothing.

The Conscientious Objector

Orcas Don't Kill People, Zoos Kill Orcas

By Amanda Park Taylor

It's time we put an end to zoos.

Art Fag City

This Year's Whitney Biennial: It's Good

By Paddy Johnson

One of the best biennials in years has plenty of great stuff for everyone... And somehow it all fits.

The Power of My Proven System

Let's Do the Right Thing and Lose to Canada

By Timothy Bracy

In which Timothy Bracy makes a case for pre-emptive hockey failure.

Fare is Fair

Do You Think the Hands-Free Ban is Fair?

By Marian Lorraine

Not only are cell phones banned, but cabbies are no longer allowed to talk, even if it's hands-free.

Reviews

Album

Has Yeasayer Developed or Simply Changed Directions?

On Odd Blood, the Brooklyn band adopts a handful of new sounds that would be better served with aspects of their old one.

By Mike Conklin

Theater

Abortion Can Be Funny

The premiere of Jonathan Reynolds' Girls in Trouble at the Flea falters in the third trimester.

By Benjamin Sutton

Books

Bolaño Goes Extra Dark with Monsieur Pain

Prolific Chilean continues to produce from beyond the grave.

By Henry Stewart

Film

Cute Kids Are Cinematic Scam Artists

Ponzi-themed family drama Children of Invention hooks its take on the zeitgeist to a couple of vulnerable moppets.

By Henry Stewart

Restaurant

I Won't Take Manhattan

North Brooklyn's latest hipster outpost ain't all that.

By Keith Wagstaff

The Measure

Abstract Expressionists for Your (Stamp) Collection

The U.S. Postal Service's newest set of stamps includes works by Pollock, Gorky and de Kooning.

Posted by Deirdre Hering at 5:10 PM

Win Free Screening Passes to Hot Tub Time Machine, Which is a Movie

John Cusack travels back to when he was cute and funny.

Posted by Jonny Diamond at 4:49 PM

This Weekend: Poor Indie-Rock Bands Need Your Help

Getting to Austin for SXSW ain't cheap, so Cake Shop's hosting a show to help out a few good bands. You should go, even though buying a ticket probably isn't tax deductible.

Posted by Lauren Beck at 4:35 PM

The Measure cont'd

Mutts Rule! Pure Breeds Suck! Yeah!

The Brooklyn Mutt Show celebrates the noblest of creatures. Which would be the mutt.

Posted by Jonny Diamond at 4:19 PM

FREE BOOZE! Art Events Tonight

This weather sucks, so art parties concentrated in Chelsea and North Brooklyn are your best bets for staying dry.

Posted by Benjamin Sutton at 4:05 PM

Coney Island Looks Gooooood in the Love Never Dies Trailer

Andrew Lloyd Webber's Phantom sequel takes place mostly underwater, apparently.

Posted by Benjamin Sutton at 3:50 PM

Listicles

14 Perfect Pi Pies

By Ben

Sunday is Pi Day (3/14, of course!), and to celebrate we baked you these 14 Perfect Pi Pies. (We had originally intended to bake 314 such pies for the sake...

Top 10 Football Scenes in Movies

By Ben

As far as sports-y metaphors for American society go, none is probably quite so eloquent and insightful as football, with its strictly divided class system, its rigid hierarchy of knowledge...

8 Super Skinny Buildings

By Ben

Wide open spaces make us nervous. We thrive off the forced conviviality and warmth of narrow apartments and tight offices overlooking tiny streets that we careen down on our bicycles...

Classified Directory

CLASSIFIED DIRECTORY Union Square, Manhattan

East West Living

NYC’s largest source for spiritual, holistic health and metaphysical books and supplies. Come browse our selection of books in over 40 sections from Astrology to Zen, extensive healing crystal department, and many other items for your spiritual practice - meditation cushions, yoga mats, candles, incense, essential oils, music, and statuary. Enjoy our tranquil space and gourmet vegetarian café, serving freshly made soups, salads, sandwiches, rice bowls, and vegan desserts. Visit the 2nd floor gallery and yoga studio, now featuring the visionary art of Alex Grey / CoSM (www. cosm.org). Gallery hours are 12pm-5pm daily. Bookstore and café hours are 12pm-9pm daily. Visit our website for a full listing of events and yoga classes www.eastwestnyc.com

RESTAURANTS Clinton Hill, Brooklyn

Maggie Brown

Brooklyn’s twist on comfort food! We serve breakfast, lunch, brunch, dinner, plus seasonal cocktails and eclectic wine. Patio and garden seating available. Call for delivery!

RESTAURANTS Fort Greene, Brooklyn

Pequeña

Brooklyn’s coziest neighborhood Mexican restaurant offering chicken tortilla soup, salads, tacos and enchiladas. Lime margaritas with fresh fruit are available! Call for delivery!

RESTAURANTS Dumbo, Brooklyn

Superfine

Seasonal, organic, locally farmed, grass feed beefiest, freshest fishiest, Mediterranean menu with a great happy hour, live bluegrass Sunday brunch, really nice customers and a local art gallery wall. Lunch & dinner Tue-Fri, dinner Sat & Sun, closed Mon.

CLASSIFIED DIRECTORY Bushwick, Brooklyn

Green Fitness Studio

RESTAURANTS Park Slope, Brooklyn

Stone Park Café

Seasonal, farm-to-table American cuisine. À la carte dining and a three-course, $30 market-driven prix fixe menu Sunday-Thursday. Comfortable and sophisticated with fresh ingredients, an award-winning beverage program and friendly, professional service.