Is My Roommate Having Too Much Sex?
by Audrey Ference
That is what Craigslist was made for, my friend: wife drilling. Bulls. Pictures of some waxed dude in a hot tub who wants to come on someone's face. Etc. Or Adult Friend Finder would work too. If nothing else, you can expand your library of cock pix. Good luck finding a dude to fuck your wife!
Dear Audrey, I've been living with my roommate for about two years now. We were strangers before we moved in together, and while I wouldn't say we're necessarily friends, we definitely hang out sometimes, and I feel like I know her pretty well. In the last few months, she's started going out a LOT more, like almost every night. She also has been going home with/bringing home a lot of guys. Previously she wasn't a prude or anything, but I've definitely seen her bone more guys in the last three months than in the previous year and three quarters by a factor of probably five. I'm a little worried about her. Like, if she's just suddenly decided she wants to explore her sexuality, great. But it seems like a drastic change to me. I can't tell if she's changed in other ways because I basically never see her any more. We don't really have any friends in common, but I guess I could find her brother's contact info— I met him once when he stayed with us for a few days. Should I butt out? Should I be worried? I don't want to be judgey, and I have no issue with her getting laid as much as she wants, but the whole thing just doesn't really feel right, somehow.
Hmm, yeah, kind of a toughie. I mean, if your instincts are telling you there's something going on with her, then it's worth exploring. But I also get that she's not really a friend friend, and a peaceful household is important to maintain. Maybe this is something somebody closer to her should have a handle on. I think there's a way to check in with her without slut shaming: it's not like you have to be all tut tut close your legs, hussy. A simple "haven't seen you around much, is everything ok with you" email would probably suffice.
I wouldn't bring her brother into it unless you're very sure that she's engaging in self-destructive behavior and there's nobody in her life taking action. I think lots of people go through periods where they go wild for a while for whatever reason, then get it out of their systems and calm down. I guess it's hard to say from your description: if she's coming home falling down drunk, that's not a good situation. Falling down drunk chicks cannot give consent, and that automatically makes these guys sleazebags. But if she's just out at the bar, having a nice time and hooking up, that seems fine.
Roommates are tricky. Ultimately you just want to share a livable home environment, which often means that you stay out of each other's shit as much as possible. It sounds like you're trying to be respectful. Check in with her and let her know you're around if she needs you.
for questions and comments, the natural redhead can be reached at sex@thelmagazine.com
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