I usually masturbate in front of the mirror, but never look at my face. Is this still considered egotistical? I read somewhere that if a mirror is involved with jerking off, you love yourself! I have some kind of low self-esteem by writing this question though, no? The way I look at it is, being a guy, I need some visual action to get going. And so yes, sometimes I break out the mag, but sometimes that’s just a pain in the ass, and the mirror is real handy. Any thoughts?
Honestly, when I read the description of your tender self-lovemaking sessions, the first thought I had is that you are pretty fucking lazy. Although I guess it would depend on the scenario. At first I pictured you lying in your darkened apartment, dick in one clenched fist, trying to summon the energy to reach under the bed for a magazine but then finally admitting defeat and rolling over to face the mirror on the back of your bedroom door. But maybe it’s more like you’re walking around the house, nude as usual, and you catch a glimpse of your crotch as you pass the mirror. The sight of your own glorious privates sends you into a fit of ecstasy that spirals out of control as you watch yourself pleasuring yourself. Whatever happened to taking the time to give yourself something special? All lighting candles around the bathtub, glass of wine, exotic scented oils, then afterward, just holding yourself ever so gently and telling yourself you can’t live without yourself?
At first I pictured you lying in your darkened apartment, dick in one clenched fist, trying to summon
the energy to reach under the bed for a magazine.
What I don’t get is why you don’t just use your imagination. Is that a guy thing? The need for visual stimulation? Instead of just closing your eyes and imagineering a thrilling sexcapade or whatever? I guess. I’m glad to know you don’t stare at your face, though. I’m not sure why, but beating off while staring at one’s own face in the mirror seems like it would be up at the top of the list of warning signs at the serial killer profiling bureau, right next to torturing animals and having a high-pitched, airy giggle.
Anyway, so I wouldn’t sweat the mirror thing too much. It’s mildly weird at worst. The fact that you’re so worried about it is almost stranger than the practice itself. Or maybe it’s kind of sweet? I’m not sure. I guess it depends on how neurotic you are in the rest of your life. That’s not really for me to decide, I guess. Either way: happy whacking!
This one guy that I hook up with whenever we’re both single texted me for a booty call one night pretty late. I was still out and up for it, so I went over to his apartment, but when I got there, he was so messed up he couldn’t get hard. I thought that since I went all the way over there, the least he could do was go downtown for a while, but he just went to sleep. Is my request unreasonable?
Sounds fair to me. Although it’s kind of hard to argue with drunk people. Plus, what if he threw up in your area? That would be a downer. The late-early-morning text message rendezvous is always sort of a gamble, I guess. Anyway, were I some kind of sexual Judge Joe Brown, I would make this young man give you one free oral satisfaction the next time he sees you. Hear that, guy? Don’t live your life in karmic oral sex debt. It’s bad for the soul.