I’m 22 years old. Every time spring comes around I become very promiscuous, but the rest of the year it’s quite dry. My friend speculated that men (and I presume women, too) are in “heat” during certain times of the year, so they become more attractive to sexual partners due to pheromones, chemistry, or what have you. What is you’re take on this? Can I only get laid in the springtime?
If I were your grandpa, I’d say “Ah, spring, the time when a young man’s fancy lightly turns to thoughts of love.” But I’m not, so instead I’ll point out that according to Scientific American’s
blog (March 22 ‘07), what they delicately term “spring fever” is at least nominally real, but no one knows for sure what causes it. Look up the article for a grab bag of sciency-sounding hypotheses.
Personally, I think it has to do with what a friend of mine calls “the boobs coming out.” You may have noticed that in the warm months, women are a lot more naked than in the winter. One is able to see their parts more clearly. They, in turn, feel the warm sun on their previously hidden away parts. Parts-related sexiness abounds.
The point is, your question is a valid one. I’m not sure if you’re saying you aren’t horny except in the spring, or that you only can get laid in the spring. If it’s the first, maybe talk to your doctor or something — that’s an awfully low libido for a fella of your tender years.
You may have noticed that in the warm months,
women are a lot more naked than in winter.
One is able to see their parts more clearly.
Parts-related sexiness abounds.
If it’s the latter, then I guess you just need to get better at picking up the ladies. If you’re a creep, you could buy that Neil Strauss book and learn his secret date-rape methods, or else just practice, be nice, highlight your assets, and hang in there. I promise, there’s tons of people who want to bone year-round.
I am an attractive, 21-year-old student with an age-old question: can a man and a woman just be friends without sex getting in the way? I have a male friend who I’ve slept with, but now he has a girlfriend. He always mentions how we’re great friends, but he wants to start screwing around again, which I know is wrong and am completely against. I decided a couple of months ago to wait to have sex until marriage but I really get horny sometimes, and he was the last guy I was with before I made the decision. The question for you is how do I maintain the friendship without compromising his relationship with his girlfriend?
The easy answer is: just don’t fuck the guy. But you know, you’ve kind of got a whole tangle of different issues here. Can men and women be friends after having slept together? Yes. I swear. I’ve done it. It just takes time and some distance. But most importantly it takes no longer being attracted to each other. If your pal really still wants to mess around, then you’ve gotta leave him alone for a bit.
Also? The no more sex before marriage thing? That’s cool if that’s how you want to be, but getting all horned up and then hanging out with an ex-fling who still wants to bang you doesn’t exactly scream “I am committed to a plan of not having sex for the foreseeable future.” No offense.
My advice to you is to think long and hard about what you want from this guy. If the answer really, truly is platonic friendship, then it’s time to stop hanging out for a little while until things cool down. You can start fresh in a few months. If that’s not really the answer, well, then that’s a whole nother pickle. And not a sex pickle, so out of my purview, I’m afraid. I deal only in sexual pickles.