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Rosie Schaap, author of the excellent memoir Drinking with Men and also the Drinks columnist for the New York Times, is the Tuesday afternoon bartender here. Having been lucky enough to share some drinks and conversation with Schaap in the past, we can’t recommend enough that you swing by, take a seat at the bar, and talk with her for a while over a whiskey or two.
629 Fifth Avenue, South Slope.
This place might seem at first like the kind of neighborhood spot where everyone will be overly friendly and not leave you alone even though all you really want is to be left alone. Turns out, that’s not the case! It’s easy enough to stake out a spot at the well-lighted bar and indulge in something from the well-curated beer list while not having to speak to a single soul—just the way we like it.
2826 Fort Hamilton Parkway, Windsor Terrace.
Maybe we were stupid to bring a book here in the first place. There isn’t really enough light, but we were waiting for a friend and didn’t want to be the jerks who whip out their phones! Once we started reading, it was open season for men trying to start conversations. First there was the guy who wanted to let us know that he had gotten his first library card that day and was excited to “finally read Hemingway.” Then there was the guy who made a dumb joke about the title of the book we were reading. (Sure, it was I Love Dick, but grow up, people!) And then came the guy who saw us writing a note to ourselves in the margin and asked to see what we wrote, as if it were any of his business. It was so terrible we resorted to playing Sudoku on our phone.
597 Manhattan Avenue, Greenpoint.
We’d rep for this newish Bay Ridge spot just because the staff is nice, the beer selection is excellent, and the backyard is big. But what really keeps us coming back is the fact that they’ll replace the Brooklyn-sourced sausage in any of the items on their impressive sausage menu with a Tofurkey beer brat. Swoon.
9221 Fifth Avenue, Bay Ridge.
Few bars have us wishing they stayed open any later than 4am because, at a certain point, things get sad. But this tavern is an exception, thanks to its very good—and very cheap—breakfast fare. Following a night of nautical-themed fun, nothing’s as satisfying as a hefty portion of French toast ($6) or an overflowing egg sandwich ($4). Tragically, brunch isn’t served until noon, but the kitchen stays open until 2am on weekends, which means you can still stumble home with a belly full of burgers or fried clam rolls.
703 5th Avenue, South Slope.