There’s a reason it’s traditional (well, not really, using diamonds in engagement rings is a ‘tradition’ perpetuated by diamond companies, BUT) fall in step with your forefathers with a single-carat diamond set in white gold, $7,250 from The Clay Pot, in Park Slope. No blood diamonds please.
NORMAL, WITH A LITTLE FLAIR
Eschew the cookie-cutter look while still being made out of delicious cookie, so to speak. Niwaka, a Japanese jeweler on Fifth Ave, offers dozens of lovely and nature-inspired bands, like Maple, $2,710.
Before the 1900s, most engagement rings were rubies, sapphires or emeralds — buck the chilly tradition of colorless ice with a dose of old glamour from Little King Jewelry, in the East Village.
Stay young at heart — like about five or six years old — with matching platinum Hello Kitty rings for her and, um, him. The bride’s version has two wee, wee diamond chips, and runs you $1,640 in funny money.
Maybe you met on the open road — she flashed you, you mouthed “pull over,” she sped off, but then you followed her to the rest stop and fell in love. Life is a highway; ride it for the rest of your life, on your hand. A platinum tire in their biggest size (13.5), sells for $3,724.
TECHNOTRONIC The Cyber Age Ring, whose website calls it, obviously, “one of our perfect gifts for new boyfriend or for a mom,” is made of silver and gold plating — entwining to become one hand, clicking one mouse. True love, you guys.
What says “forever” better than immortal, undead monsters? The 14K gold fangs on this band tenderly clutch a half-carat diamond, yours (hers) for $1,800, at Bittersweets NY, in Williamsburg, bittersweetsny.com.
It’s simple: donate some bone tissue, let it grow in a culture (it naturally grows in the shape of a ring!), have it made into jewelry (combined with precious metals), and present it to your beloved. Take it, take another little piece of my body.
A 3D ring can be lost, swallowed or given back. Opt for something you can’t ever get rid of for the rest of your life (like marriage in the good old days): ring tattoos, name tattoos or tattoos of two halves of something meaningful, like a dolphin.
Follow in glittering, gargantuan celebrity footsteps with a stupidly mammoth 10 ½-carat, heart-shaped yellow diamond, in a white diamond setting, by Jacob the Jeweler. Uh, price available upon request. (Don’t do it.)
If rings aren’t your thing, take a page from the Hopi Indians book and get your paternal aunts to attack your bride-to-be with fistfuls of mud. She’ll know it’s over when her future mother-in-law steps in to protect her.