The Shopping Cart Sagas: At the 2011 Idiotarod
by Sydney BrownstonePage 3 of 3
Twenty-odd people with the Corporation X getup and Henry McGovern nametags clamber onstage. They give out the lower tier awards—some made up on the spot, like "Most Creative Use of Monkey," but the most official, the most anticipated award is Best in Show.
The anticipation in the room is tangible.
"SHOW US YOUR TITS," Fresh is shouting.
"SHOW US YOUR TITS," the crowd replies.
And... the award goes to the Disasterpiece monsters. Fresh and Corp X hold mics to the monsters and ask if they have anything to say.
"RAWWRRRRR rarrrghghgh rraahh RRARHHWR..." Team Disasterpiece replies.
On cue, the dance party begins, Mickey Avalon's "My Dick" booming over Coco 66's speakers. Fresh free-styles into the mic, her muffled rhymes reverberating out of the venue and onto the street—where the sick beats, beer breath and debauchery of the 2011 Idiotarod are absorbed by the silently falling snow.
