I recently went to the gyno and she said I had a little bit of a bacterial infection. I hadn't noticed any symptoms or anything, and she said it was no biggie, just to eat a lot of yogurt. But then she also said I could insert the yogurt vaginally. What? Does that work? How do you even do that?
Y'know, I've heard that too. And while I'm getting to the point where I want to punch the next person who says "probiotics" to me (seriously, I'm almost starting to miss all that superfood cancer-fighting acai berry talk—I'm glad you all are enjoying your kombucha, but $4 a bottle is more than I pay for beer), yogurt really does seem to do something for your intestinal/vaginal flora.
So I'm on board with the general concept of eating yogurt to help decrease vag cooties. I have yet to see evidence that it makes you go down arrow like how Jamie Lee Curtis says on those poop yogurt commercials, but I guess maybe I'm not the target market for that. My down arrow functions pretty ok, if you must know. But the vaginal insertion: I have heard of this but never tried it, so I turned to our old friend the internet.
I guess I was imagining someone filling a syringe with yogurt and squirting it up there like Monistat, which apparently some people do, mixing one-to-one water to yogurt, but chicks on the internet say you could also soak a tampon in yogurt and pop it in, or just kind of rub it around the lips. Seems like people just leave it in for a while then take a shower. Oh and duh, use plain, please.
Poking around various natural health forums and shit, some people are extremely pro-yogurt for bacterial vaginosis and yeasties, while some people (weirdly, mostly dudes) claim that the yeast will just feed on the sugar in the milk and get worse. Someone even said she shoves a garlic clove up there and that fixes her yeast infections, but when she does she can immediately taste garlic in the back of her throat, which, whaaaat? Weird! Someone try that at home and tell me if it's true, ok? The general consensus from ladies on the internet who have tried it (plus your doctor, obviously) is that cooch yogurt is messy but effective. The reasons people give for it working are various: some say it changes the ph, some say it's the probiotics. I dunno, I'm not science. I say go for it and see if it helps. Or I guess since you aren't really having any symptoms, you might be happy just eating the yogurt. But other people with BV for real: getcha some original-Style Yoplait and have yourself an old-fashioned probiotic pussy party.
Oh and NB on the asymptomatic BV thing: all the ladies in my family have gotten diagnosed with this by our docs at some point. It's really strange—nothing seems amiss, no strange odors or foul discharges, but the doctor says the pap came back looking like a little infection. I think it might just be a natural ph thing in some people? She used to give me that glop medicine to insert but it never really did anything, and I never got a full-blown infection, so now we have reached some kind of détente. I think everyone's junk is just slightly different.