Mat Jodrell, an Australian jazzman, fell asleep on a subway ride to Queens and lost $10,000 worth of instruments. By “lost” I mean someone quite deftly plucked them from beneath his drooling countenance. The instruments in question are an Inderbinen flugelhorn and a Bach Stradivarius, so if you come across something like that in your local pawn shop, you should get in touch with Mat.
PEOPLE: IF YOU SLEEP ON THE SUBWAY TIE YOUR SHIT TO A SENSITIVE BODY PART. THIS ISN’T SUMMER CAMP. (Someone once tried to lift my bag as I slept in a French train station, but I’d tied myself to it with a shoelace. I had the satisfaction of doing one of those scary movie “I thought he was dead” wrist grabs and just snarled at the dude. Good times.)