Jesus. The Friday afternoon before the first day of spring and it’s near-perfect weather, and here I am in front of a dumb little computer screen flipping through slideshows looking for a clear shot of Katherine Heigl’s nipple. What happened to us? Where did it all go wrong? That’s it, before I have a Falling Down Moment, I’m getting the hell out of here, to enjoy what’s left of my life.
Goodbye.