We’re back for another week of horse-poop jokes, hipster riffing, and lame Arcade Fire references, all thanks to 2 Broke Girls, the only show on TV not afraid to “tell it like it is.” Below are the most ridiculous quotes and clunkers, some of them Brooklyn-centric, from episodes two (last week) and three (last night), and we’ll be back every Tuesday morning with a recap of the best double entendres Michael Patrick King and Whitney Cummings, or King Cummings for short (it’s like a 2 Broke Girls joke!), can dream up of.
#5. “No need to yell, he’s a champion.”
“Yeah, champion stink bomb. It’s smelling pretty ripe out in that yard.”
“That’s not Chestnut [a horse they keep in their “yard”]; that’s Brooklyn.”
“OK, well, I’m watching the champion drop some steaming hot Brooklyn right now.”
Guaranteed, there’s going to be an EP called Steaming Hot Brooklyn recorded by a local band before the end of the year. Also, be sure to check out the Parents Television Council website for their take on last week’s episode, which they called the Worst TV Show of the Week. I hate the fact that I agree, albeit for very different reasons.
#4. “Max, that oven is so hot. Could you do me a favor and open the backdoor?”
“We’ve known each other two days and you’re already asking for backdoor?”
This is the ultimate CBS joke. It’s vaguely risqué (I wonder how many grandparents waiting for Two and a Half Men to come on were confused by it—“see, Grandma and Grandpa, backdoor is a reference to anal sex”), but any edge the show might have had is destroyed during the next scene, when a horse walks into Max and Caroline’s apartment.
#3. “It’s getting hot in here, so leave all that Strokes t-shirt drama behind.”
Sung to the tune of Nelly’s “Hot in Herre.” The drama in question involves a Puerto Rican girl (a tough-talking, incredibly stereotypical Puerto Rican girl, of course) stealing a Strokes t-shirt from Kat Denning’s shopping basket at the Goodwill.
#2. This isn’t a quote, but I just want to point out that one of the show’s recurring jokes is the name of the children that Max baby-sits for: Brad and Angelina.
This just isn’t very funny.
#1. “If I were going to go lesbian, she’d be the last lez I’d be in.”
I’m putting this at #1 because it’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.
I didn’t notice it until later, but the title of last nite’s episode is “And Strokes of Goodwill.” See, it’s funny that I said “last nite” because that’s the name of a Strokes song, and “Strokes of Goodwill” also refers to the Strokes.
But seriously, between 2 Broke Girls and Transformers, why does Hollywood believe that the Strokes are shorthand for “cool”? And this is coming from someone who listened to “Under Cover of Darkness” four times this morning. I doubt Julian’s even heard the song that many times.
I was pretty irritated by the fact they kept calling it “the ‘will.” Never heard anyone refer to it like that.
I actually thought the lesbian joke was one of the funnier ones. I keep watching this show just to cringe at the terrible jokes. Lol The worst joke was ” I already have to be worried about being late….every MONTH!” My god.
there was also what seemed to be a play on words of an anti-semetic comment in Monday’s episode….”shoe her down”…you figure it out. really upset about it. emailed a complaint to CBS
Dude the shows kinda kool, I kinda enjoy the cheesy jokes their worth my while, their joke I would make, I’m glad that their finally making comedy shows with women being more outhere with sex jokes without being complete sluts. I love this new show n hope it sticks around.
I Love it it’s fun in a i really dont give a fck what u think kind of way