Unless you’re some kind of masochist, I know no better place to spend St. Patrick’s Day than far from the crowds of heathens at a local music show. There’s at least one red-headed shredder to check out so you can still feel like you’re doing something vaguely Irish, right? Just say yes. I already did my part today– I saw two rotund white dudes with equally white, flowing mustaches bedecked in green, shamelessly ogling teenaged lasses on the train. They suggested I smile, offered me a hug (which I respectfully declined) and then asked for directions to “the parade”– you better believe I sent them straight to Canarsie. But unless you did a similar service for society, I suggest you check out some local music makers tonight. You can see your drink maker pals any other night and let’s be real, now of all days will be their worst. And lo and behold there are plenty of other rad shows happening later this week if you’d rather stay inside and hide completely from all the dimwitted debauchery. Find our weekly picks below, please and thank you.